More students are travelling abroad for further education. Do you believe the advantages of this experience are greater than the drawbacks associated with it?

Nowadays, an increasing number of students travel overseas for higher education.

Whereas

some people argue that studying abroad is a quite positive experience, others hold the opinion that several issues are connected with

this

trend. I truly believe that international education has more beneficial outcomes, and

this

essay will explain why. First and foremost, even though moving to another country for learning purposes can be a stressful process at the start, it provides a great opportunity to explore a new culture and learn another language.

Accordingly

, individuals will develop cultural awareness

along with

practising speaking another language.

For example

, many Russian students have to save money for an extended period of time and limit their expenses in order to travel to another nation for studying purposes.

Consequently

, these learners will have more career opportunities once they graduate, as not everyone can speak another language in Russia.

Furthermore

, several international universities are considered to hold better quality education compared to other countries.

Hence

, if parents have the ability to afford first-rate institutions it will guide their children to build a successful life in the future.

For instance

, those who graduated from Oxford University are in high demand in the employment market.

As a result

, sending a child to another country leads to better working perspectives and possibilities in the future career. In conclusion,

although

studying overseas requires finances and patience, it is worth moving for a study period to gain exceptional proficiency. By obtaining

this

, young students take a big step towards their flourishing future job opportunities.

Submitted by innakireeva0101 on Mon Jan 22 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that each body paragraph focuses distinctly on either the advantages or drawbacks of studying abroad to enhance coherence.

coherence cohesion

Consider using a wider variety of cohesive devices to link ideas across sentences more smoothly for better logical flow.

task achievement

Strengthen your main points by incorporating more specific examples and evidence to support your arguments.

task achievement

For a higher score, make sure that your conclusion effectively summarizes the ideas discussed and reflects the thesis stated in your introduction.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

256 words

8.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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More students are travelling abroad for further education. Do you believe the advantages of this experience are greater than the drawbacks associated with it?

The government is spending a lot of money to discover life on other planets. Some people think that government is wasting money and should spend more money addressing the problems of public. To what extent do you agree?

In many part of the world, it is common for one parent to stay and home and raise a newborn child while the other works full-time to earn money. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

In many countries, people are living in a "throwaway society" where things are used for a short time and thrown away. what are the causes of this and what problems does it lead to?

Some people say that advetising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things . others people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it . discuss both the views and give your opinion?

Colleges and universities should require all faculty to spend time working outside the academic world in professions relevant to the courses they teach.