For the past year, you have been a member of a local club. Now you want to discontinue your membership. Write a letter to the club secretary. In your letter state what type of membership you have and how you have paid for this, give details on how you have benefited from the club, explain why you want to leave.

#year #member #club #membership #secretary #type

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Dear Mr.Smith, I hope

this

letter finds you well. My name is Vandana Tomer and I am a member of the City Fitness Club, my member ID is 3244. I am writing

this

letter to request you to cancel my membership from next month onwards. I own a family membership, in which my children and my husband are

also

under my account.I have been a part of

this

club for the

last

2 years and it will be easy to find me, because I paid all monthly payments, via credit card and debit card. I am very glad to be a part of

this

farm for almost two years. My doctor recommended

this

healthcare facility, because of my medical record ( like hypertension and obesity).In the

last

few months, I have seen drastic changes in my well-being,I lost almost 40 LB of weight and my heart health is way better now.I was like a family member in

this

gym and I definitely recommend

this

place to other people. Currently, My husband has a new job,

according to

his capability and education level, but it is in another city, that's why I want to cancel my membership. Thank you for your attention and Please let me know if you have any questions regarding my request, Thank you, Yours Truly, Vandana Tomer

Submitted by Vanurajput22 on Wed Jan 24 2024

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coherence cohesion

Consider structuring the content into more focused paragraphs, each addressing one aspect of the letter's requirements (e.g., separating the benefits gained from the club and the reasons for leaving into distinct paragraphs).

coherence cohesion

Make sure that all sentences are clearly linked, using appropriate transitions to improve the flow between sentences and ideas for better logical structuring.

task achievement

While you have covered all tasks asked for in the prompt, you could enhance the impact by elaborating further on your reasons for leaving the club and providing insight into how you plan to sustain your health without the club's facilities.

task achievement

Review your letter to ensure there are no small errors, such as typos or grammatical issues, which can detract from an otherwise suitable writing tone and complete response.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

8 paragraphs

220 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

polite greeting
membership cancellation
benefited
annual/monthly/family/individual membership
credit card/direct debit/cash payment
positive experiences
social interactions
fitness improvements
personal reasons
financial constraints
relocation
change in interests
gratitude
procedure
notice period
courteous explanation
future rejoining
sign-off

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