Essay Question: Some people think that to deal with the problem of congestion in cities, privately-owned vehicles should be banned in city centres, while others consider this to be an unrealistic solution. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #congestion #cities #vehicles #city #centres

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In order to solve the issue of traffic congestion in cities, some people suggest that private

cars

should be forbidden.

However

, some other people think

this

is not practical. I will discuss both viewpoints and give reasons to explain why I prefer the latter one. First of all, the number of private

cars

experienced a huge increase in the past decades, the reasons for

this

are the increasing population of urban cities and the lower prices a

car

costs.

Therefore

, the surge in the number of private

cars

without proper organisation leads to the problem of traffic

jam

Fix the agreement mistake

jams

show examples

. A part of

citizens

believe that banning private

cars

can improve

this

situation because it forces

citizens

to use more public transportation.

Moreover

this

measure can

also

reduce emissions from vehicles and improve the urban environment.

However

, other parts of

citizens

do not agree with

this

point of view because

this

solution is not practical for

citizens

and I stand with

this

opinion.

Although

there are positive effects exist, banning private

cars

thoroughly can not bring

citizens

a better life. Some urban

citizens

might have the chance to live without a

car

, but in the case of those who live far from the downtown, a private

car

can help them go to work conveniently.

For example

, buses do not always arrive on time and there are not enough railway lines can support

citizens

' daily work.

On the other hand

, a private

car

could be very useful if bad weather comes by.

Hence

, banning private

cars

is not a good way to reduce congestion, we should figure out how to tackle

this

problem

while

balancing

citizens

' daily lives.

To sum up

, the increasing number of vehicles creates traffic

jam

Fix the agreement mistake

jams

show examples

in cities. But I do not think

this

is the right solution because of the potential inconvenience.

Submitted by ffff815 on Wed Jan 24 2024

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Introduction/Conclusion

Ensure that you have a clear introduction that presents the topic and your stance. For a higher score, the introduction could include a thesis statement which outlines the main points that will be discussed in the essay.

Logical Structure

Increase the use of cohesive devices to improve the flow of the essay. Think about using linking words and phrases to help connect ideas more coherently.

Supported Main Points

Develop your main points further with more detailed explanations and examples. This will add depth to your argument and demonstrate a comprehensive understanding of the issue.

Task Achievement

Your essay responds to the prompt, but to achieve a higher score, make sure to cover all parts of the question. Discuss both sides of the argument in equal measure, and provide a clear explanation of your own opinion.

Relevant Specific Examples

Incorporate relevant, specific examples to illustrate your points. These examples should support your argument and demonstrate a clear understanding of the topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

303 words

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Essay Question: Some people think that to deal with the problem of congestion in cities, privately-owned vehicles should be banned in city centres, while others consider this to be an unrealistic solution. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Globalization is creating a world with a single culture and destroying national identity in the process. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Many people likes to wear fashionable clothes Why do you think this is the case? Is this a good thing or bad thing?

In some countries, m any more people are choosing to live alone nowadays than in the past. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Some people think that old buildings should be knocked down and give way to the new buildings. To what extent do you agree or disagree? How important are old buildings to us?

PEOPLE NOWADAYS ARE NOT FIT AND ACTIVE THAN THE PEOPLE FROM THE OLDEN DAYS. DISCUSS THE CAUSES FOR THIS SITUATION AND SUGGEST SOME POSSIBLE SITUATIONS.