It is impossible to help all people in the world, so governments should focus on people in their own countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Living in a world afflicted with climate change and regional conflicts, many
people
are contemplating the problem of whether we have inherent moral responsibilities for Use synonyms
people
living in other countries who are suffering from these disasters. In my view, despite empathising with the concern, I would prioritise local Use synonyms
people
's welfare.
Use synonyms
This
perspective may sound selfish, Linking Words
however
, it not only fits humans' nature but Linking Words
also
lays a solid moral foundation for helping the unknown. Linking Words
First,
it is self-evident, as Confuzi claims, that humans are inclined to develop a sense of responsibility towards Linking Words
people
whom they are familiar with. For illustration, my parents definitely have more affection for me than my cousins, which is not purely Use synonyms
due to
kinship, but Linking Words
also
owing to their familiarity with me. For them, I am so specific with all particular characteristics, Linking Words
such
as liking dinosaurs, and always playing with cats, that they cannot imagine ignoring me when I am suffering. Linking Words
This
is the moral foundation that underlies the mysterious and shared feeling that I have responsibility for others, though often attached by biologists a tag that we are merely selfish animals.
In light of Linking Words
this
, the limits behind the claim that we ought to help all Linking Words
people
have surfaced. It is irrefutable that the claim is "right", with strong moral feelings, Use synonyms
whereas
it overlooks a basic reality that Linking Words
although
there have been a few heroes who sacrifice themselves for the well-being of strangers, Linking Words
this
is not a conduct can be widespread since it lacks the feeling bases that can be shared by ordinary Linking Words
people
. Use synonyms
However
, if they consciously excavate the public potential of the instinct of caring acquaintances, the seemingly selfish nature can be altruistic. Linking Words
For example
, fully utilising newspapers and the Internet to make those suffering from starvation more tangible, which can stimulate Linking Words
people
's compassion for them.
In summary, though the essay appreciates the good willingness to help Use synonyms
people
in other countries, it cannot be achieved by excluding human nature to care more about local inhabitants. Use synonyms
On the contrary
, we should allow Linking Words
this
instinct to develop naturally and introduce abstract "others" into its eyesight, Linking Words
for example
, through media or the Internet.Linking Words
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task achievement
Make sure the thesis statement reflects a clear stance, "to what extent" you agree or disagree. It's a bit unclear at the moment.
coherence cohesion
Clarify the second body paragraph. It could use a more straightforward topic sentence to set up the argument better.
introduction conclusion present
The topic introduction is clear and provides an engaging starting point for the reader.
supported main points
Good use of personal examples to reinforce main points and illustrate ideas.
logical structure
Logical flow is present, with the essay building naturally from one idea to the next.