In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

#countries #home #people #be #case #situation

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

It is argued that

instead

Linking Words

of renting a

place

Use synonyms

to live, many

people

Use synonyms

prefer to own a

home

Use synonyms

. In my opinion, a

home

Use synonyms

lets

people

Use synonyms

create their own safe

place

Use synonyms

thus

Linking Words

, I believe brings major benefits for those who are unable to own a

home

Use synonyms

To begin

Linking Words

with, many

people

Use synonyms

choose to live in a

home

Use synonyms

since it provides broader facilities to be constructed with, later on, to be used. Unlike renting a building in which all the facilities already exist, a private

place

Use synonyms

allows the owner to be imaginative in the way they design every room and its occasion.

Additionally

Linking Words

home

Use synonyms

allows

people

Use synonyms

especially families to acquire a private life, where they can independently organize every room.

For example

Linking Words

, before marriage, many young

people

Use synonyms

initially

Linking Words

lived in an apartment

while

Linking Words

working. Once they married and had kids, they decided to buy a house where they could build up the connection and plan the future. In a term of the benefits of the aforementioned situation, I believe that it creates a positive impact for those who are interested in renting a

place

Use synonyms

Additionally

Linking Words

, the availability of various flats or apartments

also

Linking Words

has been affected by

this

Linking Words

phenomenon, which leads the agent to reduce the cost of the price.

Consequently

Linking Words

, many

people

Use synonyms

are able to provide one at an affordable price.

For instance

Linking Words

, numerous apartments in Bandung only cost around 3 million rupiah since not only the citizens but immigrants

also

Linking Words

preferred to build a house in the suburban areas of Bandung. In conclusion,

people

Use synonyms

choose to live in a

home

Use synonyms

because it allows them to get larger amenities. Other than that,

this

Linking Words

situation

also

Linking Words

helps those who are unfortunate enough to own one, to rent their

place

Use synonyms

at a much cheaper price.

Submitted by talithanakhwah19 on Wed Jan 24 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement

To improve task achievement, ensure that both parts of the prompt are addressed equally. While you covered why homeownership is important, the discussion on whether this is a positive or negative situation needs to be more developed. Include specific examples and reasons for your position.

Coherence and Cohesion

While the essay shows good coherence and logical structure overall, make more use of cohesive devices to link ideas and paragraphs together. Creating smoother transitions between points will increase the readability and cohesion of your essay.

Task Achievement

To support your main points, incorporate a wider range of relevant, specific examples. Concrete examples bring your arguments to life and make them more convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure consistent accuracy in grammar and varied sentence structures to improve the overall fluency of the essay. This aspect is important for showing language proficiency.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

292 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

ownership
renting
importance
sense of security
stability
financial investment
asset
customize
decorate
belonging
community
potential
future generations
long-term
cost advantage
control
living space

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4
band
Some people think that universities studentsshould specialise in a particular subject while others believe that they should study a range of subjects. Discus both views and give your opinion.
People accept differences of one another.
4.5
band
Some people feel that manufacturers and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of goods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your opinion
There are two controversial perspectives heading a debate over who should be the responsibility of minimizing packaging of goods. While some claim that manufacturers and supermarkets should put effort to decline the packaging of goods. The others make a statement that it is important for clients to limit the number of items with various packaging. While each has its own merit I consider it is optimal to combine both mentioned ideas
5
band
Many criminals commit more crimes as soon as they are released from prison. What do think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?
There is no doubt, that many former prisoners break the law after them are being release. This essay will explore reasons of this trend as well as elaborate the mesures which could tackle with this problem.
4.5
band
Scientist and technology experts seem to be more valued by modern society than musicians and artists. To what extent do you agree?
Science and tehcnology is the mainstones of modern societies. They are bitterly important for development and civilization. However, art is at least as important as science and technology.
<4
band
Some people enjoy change and they look forward to new experiences. Other like their lives to stay the same and they do not change their usual habits. Compare these two approaches to life and explain your perferance.
Some people try to often change their work and living place, by contrast other consider it is risk alter frequently. Personally, I agree with former statement. In this essay I will explain my viewpoint.

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Some people think that universities studentsshould specialise in a particular subject while others believe that they should study a range of subjects. Discus both views and give your opinion.

Some people feel that manufacturers and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of goods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Many criminals commit more crimes as soon as they are released from prison. What do think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

Scientist and technology experts seem to be more valued by modern society than musicians and artists. To what extent do you agree?

Some people enjoy change and they look forward to new experiences. Other like their lives to stay the same and they do not change their usual habits. Compare these two approaches to life and explain your perferance.