In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?
In several countries, bought a new
home
can show advantages and disadvantages for some people. Moreover
, renting a home
it's can be positive or negative situation. These viewpoints will discussed below.
On the one hand, owning their house
is a grateful things. They can buy their own house
from their hard-work earnings. This
is a biggest achievement for them because they finally
not have to worry about rent
cost
again. For instance
, they not need to divide their earns to rent
cost
for several months or year. However
, they can save their money
for few years, so from that savings they can buy a new home
. In addition
, owning a house
in countries is investment. Due to
this
era, house
price become so more expensive throughout the years.One day they can be able to sell this
home
more higher than first price. Therefore
, the majority of folks cannot afford rent
cost
and they think it can be investments throughout the years if buy a new home
.
On the other hand
, society likes to rent
house
than owning their house
. In some countries, if they live in rent
house
they have to ask permission every-time. For example
, they want to decorate their bedroom with wallpaper, they have to ask permission to their host house
. This
can be annoying if the owner can't be cooperative. Besides
that, they have many things that more important, so they have to save their money
. So, they didn't have money
to buy a new home
by their own money
. The urgent things like hospitality cost
or others .
In conclusion , two view have their own positive or negative situation. For me, it's a positive situation to owning their house
because that can make them feel proud with themselves because can reach this
big achievement that happens to their life.Submitted by hai
on
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task response
The essay does not entirely address the prompt fully as there is a reiteration of the advantages of owning a home but lacks depth in comparing why it might be deemed a positive or negative situation. To improve the task achievement score, you should clearly state your position and ensure that you address all parts of the task. Support your ideas with specific examples and fully develop your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
The coherence and cohesion of the essay can be significantly improved. Focus on organizing your points logically, maintaining a clear progression of ideas. Use cohesive devices appropriately, and make sure each paragraph is centered around a single main idea with well-developed supporting sentences. Employ a variety of linking words and establish clear relationships between sentences and paragraphs to enhance readability.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?