IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

**oth government investment in public transport systems and reductions in public transport ticket prices will help to reduce transport pollution greatly.** **Do you agree or disagree with this statement?** Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

#**oth #government #investment #transport #systems #reductions #ticket #prices #pollution #**do
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Pollution
Use synonyms
 is a serious global
problem
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although
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pollution
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 which is caused by traffic is one which
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can be tackled. I would agree that the main way of doing
this
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 would be to invest in public
transport
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 systems.
However
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, there are
also
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 other ways.
People
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 need to travel in order to go to work. Many
people
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 choose to travel to work in private
cars
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 which
cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
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 traffic jams in many cities twice a day, but
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also
Add a missing verb
is also
show examples
more
Add an article
a more
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 serious
problem
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. The fumes from these
cars
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 cause air
pollution
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 and
this
Linking Words
 results in poor quality, harmful air in our cities. These fumes are
also
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 a major cause
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 global warming. If
people
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 use public
transport
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instead
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 of driving
then
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this
Linking Words
problem
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 would be dramatically reduced.Cost and convenience are big factors in
people
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’s choice of
transports
Fix the agreement mistake
transport
show examples
.
For
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this
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reason
Add a comma
reason,
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 governments need to invest money to ensure that they have a
transport
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 system which is more effective than having private
car
Fix the agreement mistake
cars
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.
This
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 means that the
transport
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 system is reliable and can
be transporting
Wrong verb form
transport
show examples
 large numbers of
people
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 around the city
cheap
Change the word
cheaply
show examples
 and fast. An example of a
well developed
Add a hyphen
well-developed
show examples
 system is in Tokyo where millions of
people
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 rely on public
transport
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 there rather than driving themselves. An alternative solution to the
problem
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 is to encourage the use of electric
cars
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. We already have the technology to produce electric
cars
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 which they do not produce any fumes so do not result in air
pollution
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. Governments could encourage
people
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 to use these
cars
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 more.In conclusion, public investment in subsidized public
transport
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 infrastructure is certainly vital in order to stop
pollution
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.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
 there are
also
Linking Words
 some other alternatives with cleaner technology.
Submitted by astafieva.k on

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structure
Ensure that there is a clear introduction and conclusion that directly address the question. The essay should begin by paraphrasing the question or statement and end with a summarizing statement that reflects back on the arguments presented.
support
Strengthen the main points by providing more detailed examples and evidence. Each main idea should be elaborated on with specific information or real-world instances that directly support your argument.
development
Develop your ideas more comprehensively by exploring each point more thoroughly. This includes delving deeper into how and why public transportation investment and ticket price reductions could impact pollution.
cohesion
Work on creating smoother transitions between paragraphs and ideas. The use of cohesive devices, such as linking words and phrases, can help guide readers through your essay and improve its overall flow.
paragraphing
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea or topic sentence and that the subsequent sentences elaborate on that idea. The use of a more structured paragraph format will aid in achieving better coherence.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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