In the future, robots will do more and more jobs instead of humans. Does this development have more advantages or disadvantages?Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.

People
say that knowledge is power;
however
, nowadays more high school graduates have chosen to be employed
instead
of continuing with their learning.
Although
there are valuable resources they can get from work-based training, I believe that the disadvantages associated with it are far greater. Enrolling in on-the-job training immediately after high school has a number of strengths. To start,
people
can learn hands-on skills and real-world experiences which they cannot learn from books.
For example
, schools only teach their students how to manage human resources theoretically but in reality, interactions with real human beings are more complicated than theories have taught. At the same time,
people
can join different work societies where they can build connections with the professionals within the industry who may, eventually, help them in their future
career
advancement.
However
, if these
people
want to get a more advanced position with higher pay, eventually, they need to go back to school for
further
study. Despite these significant advantages, choosing not to attend
college
will be far from painless. First of all, a
college
education provides basic knowledge and theories that ones need in order to become successful in their
career
. Some argue that
this
knowledge can be built in an authentic working environment and more working experience.
However
, it may take a longer time and one may experience more failures and make more mistakes before they learn the lessons.
For example
, teachers can learn the methods to teach ESL (English as a second language) students when they study in
college
so they can apply what they learn at work once they graduate and get a job.
Therefore
, they can save a lot of time researching and trying
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
different methods.
Moreover
, a lot of high-paying jobs require a higher education level;
therefore
, they need to continue their schooling at an older age for
career
advancement.
To conclude
, work-based training can help us build connections and hands-on skills;
however
, these are not enough for
further
career
advancement.
This
is why I believe that the disadvantages of on-the-job training outweigh the potential benefits. To enjoy the benefits that going to work earlier can bring, university students can join internship programs
while
attending
college
.
Submitted by puimei822 on

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task achievement
Incorporate more specific examples to reinforce the points discussed. Providing detailed examples can better illustrate your arguments and add further clarity to your essay.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, consider using a wider range of linking phrases to ensure a seamless flow between sentences and paragraphs. This can enhance readability and make your arguments more compelling.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-structured with a clear introduction and conclusion, and each paragraph logically progresses to the next.
task achievement
The essay provides a comprehensive response to the task with clear and thorough arguments supported by relevant points. It effectively contrasts the advantages and disadvantages of work-based training and higher education.

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