Success is often measure by wealth and material belongings. Do yout hink wealth is the best measure of succes? what makes a successful person?

#success #measure #wealth #belongings #yout #hink #succes #person

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

According to

data, there are a lot of characteristics of successful

people

. Several of them are measured by

wealth

and material belongings, but it should not be that superficial.

Wealth

is only a symbol of belonging,

while

success

is a form of impact that appears right after the actions are taken.

Success

is a verb, not a noun. We can not measure

success

only from

wealth

and belongings, as long as it can not have any impact towards the

people

or surroundings.

Success

can be determined when

people

witness these two conditions.

Firstly

, they can help their selves by fulfilling their necessity every day without burdening

others

, which is particularly called financial freedom.

This

current condition usually happens after humans complete the development and growth process. They include basic needs, likely food, home, and clothes.

However

, some

people

now believe other needs

such

as freedom and self-actualization have

also

become important to a successful life.

People

who can be able doing their activities in good health and/or

mental

Change the word

mentally

show examples

are

also

success form

Replace the word

successful

show examples

in maintaining their body health. On the other side, the ability to help

others

also

can be called successful. From the social context, humans can not live alone in

this

world,

hence

we need companions and hands from

others

furthermore

, humans agree that good and successful

people

are the ones who like to help

others

. Particularly those who suffer from difficulties. We can help by giving our support, not just financially, but

also

mentally. If we only have time and

ear

Correct article usage

an ear

show examples

to hear, we can

also

give time to someone who needs it. Giving something that actually can not be taken back is a form of

success

. In conclusion, neither

wealth

nor material belongings,

success

can not be determined by those kinds of stuff. It can only be determined by two conditions. Whether someone who can help

them selves

Correct your spelling

themselves

show examples

or someone who can give help to

others

who need it.

Submitted by adibah.r on Mon Jan 29 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and develops that idea with supporting details.

coherence cohesion

Use a range of linking devices to connect ideas and paragraphs more effectively.

task achievement

The introduction should more directly address the question prompt. Clearly outline your view on whether wealth is the best measure of success and suggest the alternative measures that you will discuss.

task achievement

Provide more specific examples to illustrate your points about what makes a successful person. These examples help to concretize your arguments and make your essay more persuasive.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

323 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
These days, more and more people move away from the area where they were born and brought up when they become adults. Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.
Some people think that living in different country far away from their hometown is better, while the others think that being far away from you're family and home is very difficult since it's a new city there for you're all by you're own, living in different hometown can beneficial for many reasons it helps grow you're personality including facing you're fears which makes you the better version of yourself.
5
band
You are a student at Brighton Tech. and are living in private accommodation with other flatmates. You have not had hot water or heating for some time. The landlord’s workmen have tried to fix the problem but without success. Write a letter to the landlord. In your letter, •state your reason for writing •describe the problems and explain how you feel •propose a solution and risk the landlord to take action
I am the student of the Brighton Tech. My name is Lawrence and I am staying in your subiksha apartment, second floor flat number-2A. I am writing this letter to explain about the water is passing through the pipelines for daily usage is not fully hot. The plumber, which was you send last week, he did not solve this problem perfectly.
6
band
You stayed at your friend’s house when you attended a conference in Australia. Unfortunately, you left a large envelope with some important documents in your room. Write a letter to your friend. In the letter: • thank your friend for the stay • describe where you left the envelope • ask him/her to return it to you by post
I hope you and your family are all well! It was so wonderful to spend time with all of you last month. It felt great to catch up with you, get to know your children, and have fun together after so long. You have always been dear friends of mine, and always will be.
6
band
It is often considered that change is more beneficial to people than trying to avoid it and have everything remain the same. Do you think the advantages of change outweigh the disadvantages
It is often argued that change is inevitable in people’s lives. Moreover, changes are essential to humans rather than attempting to remain everything in the same way. In this essay, I will highlight the advantages and disadvantages of this statement and argue why I suppose that there are more benefits.
6.5
band
Nowadays, celebrities earn more money than politicians. What are the reasons for this? Is it a positive or negative development?
Recent years have witnessed the tendency towards celebrities receiving higher income than politicians. This essay will shed light on the underlying reasons behind this before arguing that this trend is largely negative.

Success is often measure by wealth and material belongings. Do yout hink wealth is the best measure of succes? what makes a successful person?

Your opinion

These days, more and more people move away from the area where they were born and brought up when they become adults. Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

It is often considered that change is more beneficial to people than trying to avoid it and have everything remain the same. Do you think the advantages of change outweigh the disadvantages

Nowadays, celebrities earn more money than politicians. What are the reasons for this? Is it a positive or negative development?