Success is often measure by wealth and material belongings. Do yout hink wealth is the best measure of succes? what makes a successful person?

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According to

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data, there are a lot of characteristics of successful

people

Use synonyms

. Several of them are measured by

wealth

Use synonyms

and material belongings, but it should not be that superficial.

Wealth

Use synonyms

is only a symbol of belonging,

while

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success

Use synonyms

is a form of impact that appears right after the actions are taken.

Success

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is a verb, not a noun. We can not measure

success

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only from

wealth

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and belongings, as long as it can not have any impact towards the

people

Use synonyms

or surroundings.

Success

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can be determined when

people

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witness these two conditions.

Firstly

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, they can help their selves by fulfilling their necessity every day without burdening

others

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, which is particularly called financial freedom.

This

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current condition usually happens after humans complete the development and growth process. They include basic needs, likely food, home, and clothes.

However

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, some

people

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now believe other needs

such

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as freedom and self-actualization have

also

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become important to a successful life.

People

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who can be able doing their activities in good health and/or

mental

Change the word

mentally

show examples

are

also

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Use synonyms

success form

Replace the word

successful

show examples

in maintaining their body health. On the other side, the ability to help

others

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also

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can be called successful. From the social context, humans can not live alone in

this

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world,

hence

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we need companions and hands from

others

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furthermore

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, humans agree that good and successful

people

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are the ones who like to help

others

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. Particularly those who suffer from difficulties. We can help by giving our support, not just financially, but

also

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mentally. If we only have time and

ear

Correct article usage

an ear

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to hear, we can

also

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give time to someone who needs it. Giving something that actually can not be taken back is a form of

success

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. In conclusion, neither

wealth

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nor material belongings,

success

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can not be determined by those kinds of stuff. It can only be determined by two conditions. Whether someone who can help

them selves

Correct your spelling

themselves

show examples

or someone who can give help to

others

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who need it.

adibah.rMon Jan 29 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and develops that idea with supporting details.

coherence cohesion

Use a range of linking devices to connect ideas and paragraphs more effectively.

task achievement

The introduction should more directly address the question prompt. Clearly outline your view on whether wealth is the best measure of success and suggest the alternative measures that you will discuss.

task achievement

Provide more specific examples to illustrate your points about what makes a successful person. These examples help to concretize your arguments and make your essay more persuasive.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

323 words

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Success is often measure by wealth and material belongings. Do yout hink wealth is the best measure of succes? what makes a successful person?

Your opinion

Although many people value public parks, this space could be better used for the other purposes such as residential areas for the ever growing population or to develop business and build economics. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement.

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In the future, people may no longer be able to pay for things in shops using cash. All payments may have to be made by card or using phones. Do you think this will happen one day? Why do you think some people might not be happy to give up using cash?

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case ? Do you think this is a positive or a negative delvelopment ?

Stress related illnesses are becoming increasingly common. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?