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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows CO2 emissions for different forms of transport in the European Union. The Pie Chart shows the percentage of European Union funds being spent on different forms of transport. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information in the graph below.

The graph below shows CO2 emissions for different forms of transport in the European Union. The Pie Chart shows the percentage of European Union funds being spent on different forms of transport. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information in the graph below.
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The pie chart denotes CO2
emissions
Use synonyms
form
Correct your spelling
from
show examples
 distinct forms of
vehicles
Use synonyms
 in the European Union.
Overall
Linking Words
, the highest spent
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
transportations
Fix the agreement mistake
transportation
show examples
 is roads.
In addition
Linking Words
, there are several
vehicles
Use synonyms
 that possess the same percentages in a small percentage.
Firstly
Linking Words
, there are only three
transportations
Fix the agreement mistake
transportation
show examples
 that
spend
Verb problem
cause
show examples
 huge
emissions
Use synonyms
 of CO2. Roads
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 more
numeruous
Correct your spelling
numerous
 than other
vehicles
Use synonyms
, and it spends 52%. The second position is railways
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
consumes
Change the verb form
consume
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
gas
Use synonyms
emissions
Use synonyms
that is
Linking Words
 31 per cent, and the next is public transport only 10 of percentage that expends
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
emissions
Use synonyms
 of
gas
Use synonyms
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, there are several
vehicles
Use synonyms
 that expend
gas
Use synonyms
emissions
Use synonyms
that
Linking Words
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
smallest
Correct article usage
the smallest
show examples
. Ports and unknown have a similarity of spending
gas
Use synonyms
 with
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 value around 2%, and the leftovers are intermodal, inland
waterway
Fix the agreement mistake
waterways
show examples
 and airports
also
Linking Words
 possessing the same value
that is
Linking Words
 just 1 per cent.
Additionally
Linking Words
, a possibility of
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
 conditions is induced by how many the transportations
that is
Linking Words
 distinguished from several types in that country.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "that is".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words emissions, vehicles, gas with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 3 times.
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