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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

6.Some people think that hosting an international sporting event is beneficial for a country, while others disagree. Do the advantages of hosting a major sporting event outweigh the disadvantages?

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Introduction
Nowadays, hosting international sporting occasions may bring several benefits to the
host
Use synonyms
 country, ranging from a higher number of visitors to an increase in financial income,
as well as
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 advertising a country’s culture.
However
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, there are pros and cons in
this
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 situation. It can
also
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 have a negative effect on local security, and it requires a large amount of
money
Use synonyms
 from the
government
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. In my opinion, the positives outweigh the negatives.
Body paragraph 1
To begin
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 with, the opportunity to
host
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 worldwide sporting
events
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 is the best possible advertisement of culture to substantially increase tourism.
For example
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, hosting the Summer Olympics in Sydney attracted a large number of visitors to Australia compared to the prior couple of years.
Moreover
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, another significant factor is the great potential
such
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events
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 have as a reliable source of income for the local
government
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 and the local community.
For instance
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, tennis grand slam tickets sold out from a month earlier,
also
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 local businesses
such
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 as hotels, and restaurants, pubs can double their profits in that month.
Body paragraph 2
On the other hand
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, some of the disadvantages of hosting sports occasions are the organization and preparation of sporting
events
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 require a vast sum of
money
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 and security concerns for the local community.
In particular
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, the unfamiliarity of tourists with the norms of the local country can give rise to law-breaking behaviours that may threaten the security of residents, most notably young children.
Additionally
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, hosting sports
events
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 requires a lot of
money
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 to prepare.
This
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 leads to a financial deficit if the
host
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 country fails to dedicate adequate financial resources.
Conclusion
To sum up
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, hosting an international sport brings several benefits to the local
government
Use synonyms
 and local community. Still, it
also
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 comes with a rise in crime and requires a large sum of
money
Use synonyms
. I believe the
government
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 can solve the negative aspect and
therefore
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 countries should
host
Use synonyms
 large
events
Use synonyms
.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear logical structure throughout your essay. While you have distinct paragraphs, there could be better transitions linking your ideas more effectively.
coherence cohesion
Include an introduction that clearly outlines the points you will discuss and a conclusion that effectively summarizes your arguments without introducing new information.
coherence cohesion
Back up main points with more detailed examples. While you have provided examples, adding specific statistics or case studies could make your arguments more compelling.
task achievement
Aim for a complete response to the prompt by expanding upon the disadvantages to balance the discussion of advantages, providing a more comprehensive exploration of the topic.
task achievement
Present ideas clearly and comprehensively by elaborating on each point with further explanation and depth to fully convince the reader of your argument.
task achievement
Incorporate relevant and specific examples to support each point. Consider elaborating on the Sydney Olympics and tennis grand slam cases with quantifiable data or personal observations for a stronger argument.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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