IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The bar chart shows how many tourists visit four different museums in London over a five month period from June to October.

The bar chart shows how many tourists visit four different museums in London over a five month period from June to October.
The bar graph
domenstrates
Correct your spelling
demonstrates
 the number of tourists who visit four different UK museums between June and July.
Overall
Linking Words
, what stands out from the graph is National
Use synonyms
museum
Capitalize word
Museum
show examples
 is the least popular,
while
Linking Words
, history
Correct your spelling
the History
Use synonyms
museum
Capitalize word
Museum
show examples
accountes
Correct your spelling
accounts
accounted
 for the majority of visitors over the period in question. An important fact is by
Augest
Correct your spelling
August
, both
history
Correct article usage
the history
show examples
museum
Use synonyms
 and
British
Correct article usage
the British
show examples
Use synonyms
museum
Capitalize word
Museum
show examples
climb
Wrong verb form
climbed
show examples
 dramatically and
peak
Wrong verb form
peaked
show examples
 at 600.000 and 700.000 visitors respectively. Despite the fact that by the end of the
period
Add a comma
period,
show examples
 figures for British
Use synonyms
museum
Fix the agreement mistake
museums
show examples
witness
Wrong verb form
witnessed
show examples
 a sharp fall to about 480.000, it is the most significant
museum
Use synonyms
 in popularity.
Also
Linking Words
 evident is,
figures
Correct article usage
the figures
show examples
 for
national
Correct article usage
the national
show examples
museum
Use synonyms
 do not change over the studied period and it is fluctuating marginally around 200.000 people. ,
whereas
Linking Words
, after a slight rise in science
museum
Use synonyms
 popularity in
september
Change the capitalization
September
show examples
 it
begin
Change the verb form
begins
show examples
 to go down and reach 300.000 in September.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words museum with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: