Over the past few decades with the help of internet an unimaginable amount of information has become widely available to the public. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development?

Recently,
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
an unimaginable
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
lot of
information
has become widely available to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society. There are several benefits and drawbacks of
this
issue, and
this
essay will elaborate in detail
as well as
examples in the subsequent
paragpraph
Correct your spelling
paragraph
paragraphs
.
To begin
with, the first merit is someone
easier
Correct word choice
easy
show examples
to communicate with other
people
. Society who is located in distant
place
Fix the agreement mistake
places
show examples
is able to still interact with others because there is an
internet
.
For instance
, young
people
who work or study
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
abroad are able to afford some
informations
Change the wording
information
pieces of information
show examples
to their family only through a smartphone so that their parents are not anxious
with
Change preposition
about
show examples
the condition of their children.
In addition
, there is a technology providing education
that is
entailed.
This
situation can increase
knowledge
Correct article usage
the knowledge
show examples
and insight the children through the
internet
.
For example
, if students do not know about their subjects in school, they can search on the
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
such
as Google or YouTube.
Secondly
, the demerit of
Add an article
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
is easier entered by another
culture
from another country. A minority of
people
is
Verb problem
find it
show examples
easy to obtain
information
about
culture
Add an article
the culture
show examples
of
abroads
Change the capitalization
Abroads
show examples
, and if they are appealed
, they
Change preposition
to, they
show examples
are going to search
and
Change preposition
for and
show examples
influenced
Wrong verb form
influence
show examples
that
culture
.
For Instance
, nowadays, several youngsters prefer to follow the
culture
from Korea
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
such
K-Pop
Change preposition
as K-Pop
show examples
than flourishing their
culture
from Indonesia. They frequently join in some concerts
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Korean Pop, and even, they
collect
Rephrase
even collect
show examples
stuffs that involve
Korean
Replace the word
Koreans
show examples
.
Thus
,
making
Verb problem
apply
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
majority of
people
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
more loving
culture
Fix the infinitive
to culture
show examples
from another country than their nation.
Additionally
, many contents that are not suitable
with
Change preposition
for
show examples
the age are widely spread.
The children
Correct article usage
Children
show examples
who are under 17 often acquire
information
about adult's
contents
Fix the agreement mistake
content
show examples
in several social media like Instagram, TikTok and Twitter.
To sum up
, there advantages of technology are making
easier
Correct pronoun usage
it easier
show examples
someone
Change preposition
for someone
show examples
to interact with
another
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
family and
getting
Wrong verb form
get
show examples
education
Replace the word
educational
show examples
information
.
However
, there disadvantages of these tools are another
culture
easier
influencing
Change the verb form
to influence
show examples
the local
people
and
many
Correct quantifier usage
much
show examples
informations
Correct your spelling
information
not suitable
with
Change preposition
for
show examples
the age.
Submitted by fifi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction
Ensure that the introduction presents the topic clearly and outlines your argument. The provided introduction is too brief and lacks a clear thesis statement.
Cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices and paragraphing effectively to structure your essay. Avoid run-on sentences and aim for clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph.
Main Points
Develop main ideas with specific examples and explanations. Some main points are listed, but more development is needed to fully explain and support your points.
Position
Maintain a clear position throughout the essay. While advantages and disadvantages are mentioned, the specific stance on the issue is not consistently clear.
Grammar and Accuracy
Work on improving grammatical accuracy and range, as errors with verb forms, articles, and prepositions are noticeable and can impede understanding.
Conclusion
Expand on your conclusion to summarize your main points and restate your overall opinion clearly. This helps in fulfilling the task requirements and provides closure to your essay.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • digital age
  • information superhighway
  • cyberspace
  • data deluge
  • online resources
  • virtual connectivity
  • e-learning
  • content curation
  • digital literacy
  • fact-checking
  • misinformation
  • filter bubble
  • online privacy
What to do next:
Look at other essays: