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Writing Samples
Band 6

in some countries, people are hiring a personal fitness trainer rather than playing sports or doing exercise classess what are the reason for this is this a positive or negative develpment

#countries #people #fitness #trainer #sports #exercise #classess #reason #develpment
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Private trainers are in higher demand in several countries. Conducting the trainers has more benefit in performing sports or physical exercise as they can likely scan through a diet habit and the abilities of individuals that can perform during the session. I believe that there would be a positive impact from getting a private
trainer
Use synonyms
instead
Linking Words
 of doing class activities. Nowadays, more and more people build
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
healthy
habit
Fix the agreement mistake
habits
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 by making time to go to the gym and eating clean. Going to the gym doesn't help a person get into shape;
thus
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 is where the private instructor gets involved. To be honest, hiring the instructor is costly, but he or she helps to advise on good posture
as well as
Linking Words
 knows various types of exercise that can benefit the targeted body parts.
For example
Linking Words
, adding extra weight to certain exercises when they believe that their trainee is capable.
Moreover
Linking Words
, fitness trainers are more likely to give suggestions on the series of meals that are essential for the body during the training, which is one of the facts that helps in building the muscles and shapes that they desire. Exercise in classroom form is not a bad idea either;
however
Linking Words
, there might be at least ten to twenty people in each session. The
trainer
Use synonyms
 won't be able to concentrate on everyone.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the
trainer
Use synonyms
 normally has back-to-back sessions, so it will be difficult to consult one-on-one. It can be concluded that getting an individual
trainer
Use synonyms
 can help you get in shape and advise on diet recommendations and correct posture.
Hence
Linking Words
, the reason for getting the physical advisor will have a positive impact in the future.
Submitted by ruthnangying on

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Introduction & Conclusion
Make sure your essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, establishing your position and summarizing your main points at the end to enhance clarity and cohesion.
Logical Structure
Develop a more logical structure by organizing your essay into clear paragraphs, each with a central idea, following conventional essay structures, such as introduction, body, and conclusion.
Task Completion
Expand on the task by addressing all parts of the question adequately, ensuring that both reasons for hiring a personal fitness trainer and a discussion of whether it is a positive or negative development are included.
Idea Development
Provide clear and comprehensive ideas by further explaining the reasons behind the trend and its consequences. More detailed exploration and explanation of ideas can improve your task response.
Supporting Examples
Use specific examples to support each point you make; while you have given some examples, they could be more detailed and relevant to each idea you're presenting to improve coherence.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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