Some people think that competitive sports have a positive effect on the education of teenagers while others argue that the effect is negative. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Effect
Correct article usage
The effect
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on
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of
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competitive
sports
has become long contradictory among many people, whether it brings
such
positive or negative contributions to teenagers' education or not. Despite it could lead to a potential backfire among players, the critical thinking that may occur during the games may offer more benefits. On the one hand, teenagers who play
sports
with high
competitiveness
and pressure may bring a high possibility of
conflict
,
thus
affecting their learning process to collaborate with others. To illustrate, in a football competition among schools in a particular area,
students
have an obligation to bring sovereignty to the school during the game.
As a result
, it will give the
students
a big pressure.
Furthermore
, the pressure given emerges the high
competitiveness
. If it is not followed by a conducive environment to ensure fair play,
conflict
may occur.
Moreover
, backfire feelings attributed to the deterioration of
students
' collaboration sense with others during
this
period of
conflict
.
On the other hand
,
sports
which have a high level of
competitiveness
will teach
students
to employ some sort of meticulous strategy by which they can develop good survival abilities.
For instance
, in the previous example, corroborating with the coach and school committee,
students
will have a chance to learn about making a good strategy for winning the competitions.
Likewise
, they
also
have a pivotal role in applying the strategy in the game field. By
this
act,
students
can reap the beneficial aspects of making and applying strategies that can be applied in their daily lives. It includes the ability to arbitrage
conflict
and to make a peaceful situation.
To sum up
, the high
competitiveness
of
sports
has two sides, the positive and negative ones. It is plausible that the latter will bring a devastating issue for the educational context by its potential
conflict
. But, the former is deeply teaching the
students
to deal with it.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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Introduction and Conclusion
Ensure a clear and distinct introduction that presents the topic and your stance, followed by body paragraphs that elaborate on each view, and a conclusion that summarizes your discussion and reiterates your opinion.
Paragraph Structure
Adopt a logical paragraph structure, with topic sentences that introduce the main idea of each paragraph, followed by supporting details and examples.
Cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices to link ideas within and across sentences and paragraphs, but avoid overuse.
Supporting Points
Develop each main point thoroughly with detailed explanations, and include more specific examples to support your arguments.
Task Response
Directly address the task by discussing both views and clearly stating your own opinion throughout the essay, not just at the end.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • promote a healthier lifestyle
  • valuable life skills
  • mental focus
  • teamwork and communication
  • time management
  • stress relief
  • neglecting academics
  • intense pressure
  • physical injuries
  • mental stress
  • time commitment
  • fear of failure
  • emotional well-being
  • academic performance
  • balancing sports and academics
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