It's generally believed that success in fields such as art and sport can only be achieved if a person has natural talent. However, it's sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or artist. Discuss both these views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Usually,
people
think that
success
in areas like
art
or sport can be only
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
a
person
who has natural
talent
. But some
people
also
think that every child can be an athlete or artist . In
this
essay, I will discuss both sides and give my own opinion.
People
argue that
success
in areas
such
as
art
and
sports
is largely dependent on a
person
's natural talents. They argue that some
people
have natural qualities that make them more likely to achieve high results. Examples include famous artists
such
as Pablo Picasso or athletes
such
as Usain Bolt, whose unique
abilities
and achievements are often attributed to their natural
talent
.
On the other hand
, there is the idea that anyone can achieve great
success
in an
art
or sport with preparation and education.
This
idea is supported by research demonstrating that practice and hard
work
play a key role in achieving mastery. Examples of
success
of
people
who achieved
success
through constant
work
support
this
view.
However
,in my opinion,
success
in areas
such
as
art
and
sports
depends on both natural
talent
and hard
work
.Natural
abilities
can give a
person
an initial advantage, but without hard
work
, these
abilities
may remain unrealized.
On the other hand
, even without natural
talent
, a
person
can achieve high results if he is ready to invest a lot of effort and time in developing his skills.For illustration, Leonardo Da Vinci had
talent
, but
also
he developed his skills and
abilities
, always experimenting and learning, his works are both a natural ability and hard
work
. Another example on the
sports
side it’s Michael Jordan
in addition
to his incredible physical attributes, he is
also
known for his incredible
work
and constant
work
on himself. His
success
is the result of a combination of natural
talent
and hard
work
. In conclusion, I want to say that in
this
way I believe that
success
in
art
and in
sports
is the result of a natural ability and hard
work
.
Submitted by sa_artek on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
While the essay has a clear structure, it can benefit from more detailed explanations and specific examples to strengthen the arguments. Discuss more varied points and ensure each idea is fully developed.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs. Use more transitional phrases to guide the reader smoothly through your arguments. This will help to clarify your reasoning and make your essay easier to follow.
coherence cohesion
Consider expanding the conclusion to summarize the main points discussed in the essay. This will reinforce your arguments and provide a stronger closing statement.
task achievement
The essay has a clear introduction, where the topic is succinctly presented and both viewpoints are mentioned.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively restates the main opinion, providing a sense of closure to the discussion.
task achievement
There is an attempt to provide examples to support the viewpoints, which helps to make the arguments more concrete.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • natural talent
  • innate ability
  • genetic predisposition
  • nurture
  • nurturing
  • develop
  • cultivate
  • foster
  • encourage
  • inherit
  • unravel
  • reveal
  • demonstrate
  • evidence
  • proof
  • counterargument
  • counter
  • overcome
  • compensate
  • arguably
  • debate
  • controversial
  • persuasive
  • convincing
  • conclusive
  • critical
  • essential
  • crucial
  • vital
  • significant
  • prominent
  • noteworthy
  • imperative
  • compulsory
  • fundamental
  • compelling
  • persuasive
  • support
  • favor
  • oppose
  • disagree
  • acknowledge
  • consider
  • claim
  • view
  • belief
What to do next:
Look at other essays: