In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
In recent decades,
urbanization
rates around the world have been increasing. I believe this
is a negative development because of some reasons. First,
this
situation proves that the government does not pay attention to the rural areas
' development. Second,
the increasing numbers of cities population leads to many problems such
as traffic congestion and destroyed public facilities.
On the one hand, the big gap between urban and rural areas
' facilities is the main reason for countryside citizens moving to the cities. Living in a place with hard access to crucial things such
as hospitals, jobs, and transportation would be hard to imagine. In addition
, the survey from the New York Times explains that the top reason for urbanization
is to attain a better life with a proper job. However
, the statistic shows that not all immigrants successfully obtain a job and end up being jobless. Therefore
, the councils are responsible for maintaining rural areas
.
On top of that, their movement to new places is not resolving their problems. In big cities with intense competition, another problem arose. For instance
, based on Jakarta's (the capital city of Indonesia) assessment, traffic congestion has become a problem after urbanization
was initiated. Some public facilities, such
as public transportation, also
start to run out of capabilities to carry out many people. These explain why urbanization
is not always a good solution.
Furthermore
, the deteriorating population of rural areas
can contribute to insufficient farming and agriculture workers. Considering the countryside is currently the biggest space for agricultural work, the food chains worldwide can be disrupted.
In conclusion, urbanization
's disadvantages outweigh the advantages. Therefore
, it is such
a negative solution that we should not choose. Instead
, the nation could construct the countryside to become an easy place to live. That way, urbanization
would not be needed and the rural's citizens can live peacefully there.Submitted by farrandyerza on
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coherence cohesion
Consider structuring the essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and be connected with the others effectively.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that the introduction briefly outlines your main points and that the conclusion effectively summarizes your arguments. Both should link back to the initial question clearly.
task achievement
Develop each main point with relevant examples and explanations. Avoid general statements by providing specific, detailed evidence to support your arguments.
task achievement
Make sure to respond to all parts of the question. Discuss both sides if the question requires it and provide a clear opinion.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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