IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Air traffic is increasingly leading to more noise, pollution, and airport construction. Some people say that government should try to reduce air traffic by taxing it more heavily. Do you agree or disagree?

#air #traffic #noise #pollution #airport #construction #people #government
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The usage of
air
Use synonyms
 transportation has created a major climate crisis, namely noise, pollution, and even massive tree-cutting
due to
Linking Words
 the high demand for airport buildings.
While
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 some people disagree that
this
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 statement contradicts reality, I stand my point that these environmental matters should be addressed by putting higher taxes on
air
Use synonyms
 traffic facilities. In terms of that,
this
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 essay will run you through my perspectives about why the government should take action by the
tax
Use synonyms
 regulation. Everyone agrees that the economy is inseparable from the matters of environmental sustainability. Increasing the burden of
air
Use synonyms
 transport taxes is one of the effective solutions.
This
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 way, not only does the access get narrower for society, but
also
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 it can eventually press the level of any
air
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 traffic activities, pushing all the ecological problems downwards.
For instance
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, the authorized government can extend the price of airplane tickets, or even the amenities around the airport area,
such
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 as food, accommodations, and many more.
Besides
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, the new regulation that collects payments
due to
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this
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 particular reason, can be beneficial to the ruler of the country,
hence
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, the citizen will have their right to the money, allocated from the plane
tax
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 law,
while
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 at the same time taking advantage of a clean environment. Take Singapore as an example. The whole
tax
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 and environment scheme has been going on since they have a strict rule to take those who are littering around the streets seriously by making them pay a quite big amount of money for polluting the ground. In conclusion, as the largest group that has a big power of influence in the country, I agree with the statement that
air
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 traffic facilities should be demanded with higher
tax
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 in order to create an environmental-friendly region.
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coherence cohesion
To strengthen coherence and cohesion, ensure that there is clear logical progression from one idea to the next. Use a wider range of cohesive devices and topic sentences to guide the reader through your argument.
coherence cohesion
For the introduction and conclusion, while present, they could be improved by directly addressing the question posed with a more explicit thesis statement and summarizing main points more effectively.
task achievement
Back up main points with more detailed examples and evidence. Provide specific cases or data where possible to support your argument and demonstrate a clear position.
task achievement
Enhance task response by ensuring that all parts of the prompt are directly addressed and by providing a more balanced argument with potential counterarguments and rebuttals.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • air traffic
  • noise pollution
  • air pollution
  • airport construction
  • environmental damage
  • natural habitats
  • taxing
  • discourage
  • unnecessary travel
  • impact on the environment
  • government taxation
  • promote sustainable alternatives
  • public transportation infrastructure
  • reduce the demand
  • funding initiatives
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