governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. to what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Rail
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lines
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are to people what life jackets are to swimmers. It is argued that policymakers should invest in
rail
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lines
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instead
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of
roads
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. I completely agree with
this
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matter and the reasons for
this
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issue are discussed below.
Rail
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lines
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introduce several benefits in terms of the environment.
It is clear that
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trains and subways are more environmentally friendly in comparison to
roads
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and they produce less emission
due to
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the fact that
rail
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lines
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use electric power
such
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as wind or solar power in most cases, as a source of energy which is completely renewable without any disadvantage to the environment,
instead
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of the gasoline which is absolutely harmful not only for the society but
also
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for the environment. the classical example is a city in Japan which replaced most
roads
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with
rail
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lines
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and it's residents experienced a sharp decrease in air pollution after a year.
Rail
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lines
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prevent road congestion as well. It is obvious that improving
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rail
Correct article usage
the rail
show examples
line's infrastructure can address the issue of traffic jams on streets and motivate people to take advantage of safe and fast
rail
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lines
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for commuting
instead
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of driving private cars on
roads
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.
Although
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some believe that building railways is impossible in suburbs and it costs a lot of expenses for policymakers, I personally assume that it is worth spending money constructing
rail
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lines
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and it is possible in most cases. In the final analysis, for all the apparent greatness of
rail
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lines
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, it would be in our interests if policymakers consider more money for building railways. If
rail
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lines
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are,
as a result
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, like life jackets,
then
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they can save people.
Submitted by zara.nazarahari on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay presents an argument with an introduction and conclusion, which is good for structure. Work on developing a clearer progression of ideas throughout your essay.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single idea and use a variety of cohesive devices to link ideas and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
You've provided support to your main points, but the development can be stronger. Try to give more detailed examples and explanations to reinforce your argument.
task achievement
In the task response, your position is clear, but you could express a more balanced view by acknowledging the other side of the argument before refuting it.
task achievement
Your ideas are relevant, but consider providing real-world examples to back up your claims. Specific data or case studies could make your argument more persuasive.
task achievement
Make sure to complete all thoughts and sentences. Some parts of the essay seem to be cut off abruptly, which may leave the reader with an unfinished point. Pay attention to sentence completion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Carbon emissions
  • Mass transportation
  • Traffic congestion
  • Economic growth
  • Regional development
  • Initial investment
  • Feasibility
  • Flexibility
  • Rural areas
  • Integration
  • Sustainable
  • Efficiency
  • Infrastructure
  • Commuters
  • Public expenditure
  • Autonomous vehicles
  • Long-term investment
  • Accessibility
  • Connectivity
  • Modal shift
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