In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
A significant number of
people
living in some villages around the world are shifting their lives to more developed towns; hence
, the population of people
residing in rural areas is decreasing. While
this
phenomenon brings several drawbacks, such
as the fact that villages remain undeveloped due to
the fact that the people
are moving away, this
essay agrees that the positive impacts outpace the negatives since the countrypeople are getting better jobs in the cities
.
When the number of people
residing in rural areas decreases, the infrastructure in the area is more likely to be the same from time to time. This
is due to
the fact that the government has no urgency to develop the area as the citizens keep moving away to the cities
. For instance
, people
who live on a small, remote island will never see high-rise buildings in their area because there is no significant reason to build one.
On the other hand
, when those people
are moving their lives to the cities
, there are chances that they will have better jobs and broad knowledge. This
is because their former hometowns do not have proper universities, and the job market is typically not producing enough wages. Therefore
, this
essay agrees that this
action will have a greater impact than a setback due to
this
reason. For example
, several high school graduates are admitted to some top-ranking universities in other cities
; hence
, in the future, they will be able to seek better careers and brighter opportunities.
To conclude
, although
there are some setbacks to rural citizens shifting their lives to better cities
, such
as leaving their hometowns undeveloped, this
phenomenon should be seen as a positive development because they will have greater chances for a
better education and, Remove the article
apply
thus
, leveraging their careers.Submitted by nadillamntr on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
Focus on developing a clear thesis statement in your introduction that outlines the forthcoming arguments in your essay. This will provide a roadmap for the reader and strengthen the overall logical structure.
task achievement
Make sure to introduce your essay with a more balanced approach, showcasing both sides of the argument before stating your own position.
coherence cohesion
Work on creating a more effective conclusion by summarizing your key points and restating your opinion, ensuring it encapsulates all the arguments made.
task achievement
Incorporate more specific, detailed examples that are directly relevant to the points being made. While the examples given are suitable, adding more depth and detail can enhance their impact and the persuasiveness of the essay.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!