Most people have forgotten the meaning behind traditional or religious festival; during festival periods, people nowadays only want to enjoy themselves. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
In
this
day and age, many claim that by festival periods most of
Change preposition
apply
people
want to just enjoy of
them Change preposition
apply
while
they have forgotten the meanings
behind this
historical and religious Correct determiner usage
these
festivals
. I opine that, although
people
are looking for an excuse to have some fun times, they still know the meaning behind these festivals
by
some different ways like schools, Change preposition
in
internet
and so on.
Regarding Correct article usage
the internet
monotonous
Correct article usage
a monotonous
life style
, Correct your spelling
lifestyle
people
do not have much time to carry out research about the meaning of traditional and religious festivals
. Earning money, working, studying
Correct word choice
and studying
are
made Verb problem
have
people
’s life
frustrated. Fix the agreement mistake
lives
When ever
they find Correct your spelling
Whenever
a
leisure time on holidays they just want to gather together and spend some fun hours with each other. Actually, they are looking for an excuse to be happier. These days many of us face mishaps that make us hopeless and Correct determiner usage
some
tiered
. So, Correct your spelling
tired
festivals
are the best choice to relax or have some different activities like dancing. Festivals
help people
unwind and reduce their stress. Therefore
the meaning behind this
Correct determiner usage
these
festivals
are
not so important.
Change the verb form
is
However
, most of
Change preposition
apply
people
have not forgotten this traditional
Change the determiner
this traditional festival
these traditional festivals
festivals
yet by
some ways. The Change preposition
in
meanings
behind these festivals
are still taught by families and schools. Many families have some boundaries which explain festivals
traditionally to the children. Some traditional courses are taught by schools. They force children to learn this
information
completely. By setting some strict roles like taking some exams according
Add the preposition
according to
this
traditional information
, students will never forget them. In addition
by
Change preposition
with
improvement
of technology Correct article usage
the improvement
many
Correct word choice
apply
information
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
access
easily and clearly. They turn from boring Wrong verb form
accessed
information
to interest
Replace the word
interesting
information
which are
fascinating for Change the verb form
is
people
. Many video
are made and uploaded Change to a plural noun
videos
in
different platforms like Instagram, Facebook, Change preposition
on
Youtube
and so on which explain the Correct your spelling
YouTube
meanings
of traditional and religious festivals
exactly. I know these type
of videos are common Fix the agreement mistake
types
between
teenagers nowadays.
In conclusion, it is true that Change preposition
among
people
might want to be happier in their life
by celebrating Fix the agreement mistake
lives
festivals
, they
have not forgotten the Correct word choice
but they
meanings
behind these traditional and religious festivals
. If you ask about the history of this
Correct determiner usage
these
festivals
, they will answer you clearly.Submitted by dayansabet on
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coherence cohesion
Work on structuring your essay with clear paragraphs for introduction, main points, and conclusion to enhance readability and coherence.
coherence cohesion
For a higher coherence and cohesion score, make use of a wider range of cohesive devices (e.g., conjunctions, pronouns, synonymy) to ensure the flow from one sentence to another and from one paragraph to the next.
task achievement
To fully address the task, ensure that your essay provides a balanced view covering both the extent of agreement and disagreement with the statement and develops these points well.
task achievement
In order to make your ideas clearer and more comprehensive, aim to elaborate on your key points with further explanation and depth.
task achievement
To strengthen your argument, include more varied and detailed examples that are directly relevant to the topic. This will enhance your task response score significantly.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite