Some people think that the most important thing about being rich is it gives a person the opportunity to help other people. Do you agree or disagree?

Few individuals believe that the most crucial thing about being wealthy is that it allows people to support those humans who need it.
However
, I partially agree with the statement that when a person becomes financially strong they can easily aid those individuals who are unable to afford the necessities. But it depends on a person's nature and what they want it is optional for them to help
others
. I will discuss
this
in detail in my essay below.
To begin
with, it is a fact that hard work matters a lot to achieve their desired goals and if one can reach its destination and reach that level where he can earn a heavy amount of money. So, with the help of that money, they can support the needy people who do not have
such
facilities that they have.
For example
, in most European regions they can deduct the money in the form of tax from those who earn better and
hence
give to those who need it. By doing so they maintain the equality between the citizen and everyone is happy at their own pace. It shows how generous the communities are.
Secondly
, it's the individual's own choice whether they want to aid
others
or not because they gain all
this
after a lot of effort and it is
also
not easy for them to gain
such
success. It takes years to build the castle of their dream and for that, they make many sacrifices after all that they reach the point where they stand now.
Furthermore
, now it's up to them whether they want to share their luxuries with
others
or not. They do a lot to feel satisfied with their
life
and give best to their loved ones. Now they can do various things like
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
to different rustics without any financial problems and they can do so because they earn that after great hardship so it is their reward to live their
life
as they plan. In conclusion, the most significant thing about being rich is that it enables people to enjoy their
life
accordingly
and enjoy more things in their
life
about which they dream.
Although
helping
others
is
also
beneficial for communities it's optional.
Submitted by aimenmalik2021 on

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Coherence & Cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences within each paragraph are logically connected to support that main idea. Vary your linking words and phrases to guide the reader through your arguments, and avoid too much repetition of the same structures.
Task Achievement
Your essay should fully answer all parts of the question. Make sure to address the prompt directly and develop your ideas fully. Additionally, your opinion should be clear throughout the essay, and your conclusion should reflect the points made in the body paragraphs.
Task Achievement
Provide specific examples to support your points. The examples should be directly related to the arguments you are making and should help to illustrate your points more vividly.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • wealthy
  • financial resources
  • philanthropy
  • charitable organizations
  • donations
  • fundraising
  • support
  • initiatives
  • contribute
  • fulfillment
  • purpose
  • selfless
  • altruistic
  • prioritize
  • personal gain
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