In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages?

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It is stated that, currently life expectancy of people is extended in several nations. It is considered by some
an
Correct word choice
that an
show examples
elder population
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
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issues for state authorities,
while
Linking Words
others believe that there are positive outcomes of many
elders
Change noun form
elders'
elder's
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existence in the society. The benefits of increasing aged head
count
Use synonyms
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
completely significant than
its’
Correct your spelling
its
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drawbacks. The growth of the
elders
Replace the word
elderly
show examples
count
Use synonyms
causes strain on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
national health and other social welfare systems. There are more caregivers and resources are needed to allocate for their
wellbeing
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well-being
show examples
which can facilitate for younger generation.
In addition
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, authorities require continuing their retirement payments and other related facilities over
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
long time period. It can be
extra
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an extra
show examples
burden for the particular country and not returned.
However
Linking Words
, the
experience
Use synonyms
and knowledge of senior citizens are important
asset
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assets
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to
the
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their
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fellow individuals.
To build
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Building
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up
required
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the required
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skills and
experience
Use synonyms
take
Correct subject-verb agreement
takes
show examples
many years and replacing
of matured
Change preposition
mature
show examples
senior
Fix the agreement mistake
seniors
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is difficult in various
field
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fields
show examples
.
For instance
Linking Words
, medical students undergo training under senior doctors as an essential part of their bachelor and
experience
Use synonyms
from their experts
is play
Wrong verb form
plays
show examples
vital
Add an article
a vital
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role in their future
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
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.
Consequently
Linking Words
,
sustainability
Correct article usage
the sustainability
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of
community
Correct article usage
the community
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is
Verb problem
apply
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greatly
depending
Wrong verb form
depends
show examples
on
consultation
Correct article usage
the consultation
show examples
of senior people. Through their knowledge and past
experience
Use synonyms
they
competent
Add a missing verb
are competent
show examples
to direct
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
individuals
by
Change preposition
through
show examples
correct
decision making
Add a hyphen
decision-making
show examples
and risk analysis. If
elder
Correct article usage
the elder
show examples
head
count
Use synonyms
is increasing
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society will be safer and more productive
due to
Linking Words
their guidance. In conclusion, even though climbing up of older
count
Use synonyms
make burden to
state
Correct article usage
the state
show examples
,
contribution
Add an article
the contribution
show examples
of elders through their
experience
Use synonyms
and knowledge
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
tremendous.
Submitted by thushari8814 on

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Task Achievement
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Coherence and Cohesion
For Coherence and Cohesion, work on organizing your essay more effectively by using a variety of linking words and clear topic sentences. Connect your ideas more logically and maintain a clear progression of ideas throughout your writing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • ageing population
  • benefits
  • disadvantages
  • advantages
  • experience
  • knowledge
  • contribution
  • economy
  • society
  • healthcare
  • youth employment
  • community
  • intergenerational support
  • volunteerism
  • mentorship
  • increased demand
  • pension costs
  • social welfare systems
  • workforce
  • productivity
  • intergenerational conflict
  • technological adaptability
  • dependency
  • effective
  • skill development
  • employment opportunities
  • intergenerational solidarity
  • communication
  • lifelong learning
  • technological literacy
  • age-friendly
  • social policies
  • infrastructure
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