Many people strive to maintain a successful career and happy life at the same time. What problem can this situation cause? What can be done about this problem?
Multitude entities try to have a prosperous
life
and spend their spare time
with their family. The major problems and this
issue are exhaustion and child behavioural issues and the most viable solution is designated periods of family time
.
To begin
with, maintaining success in one's life
and happiness at home. This
is because achieving both requires a substantial amount of time
and one must forget the activities required for relaxation and recuperation. Another issue is that children of people with these aspirations are less likely to conduct themselves appropriately. As their parents are often preoccupied with issues at work, they ignore their children's behavioural problems instead
of what is acceptable by
society. Change preposition
to
For example
, in Silicon Valley in California, employers are put under huge pressure to work long hours and behavioral
problems at school are more than in similar schools Change the spelling
behavioural
elsewhere
.
To tackle this
problem families should designate strict periods that are for family only. This
is to say that parents would decide upon a time
each day that cannot be interrupted by work and is solely focused on quality time
with each other. This
could be each evening or on the weekends and would help parents relax from the pressure of their career, and the child would get the attention that they deserve without any distracting their
mother. Change preposition
from their
For instance
, it is traditional for many families around the world to eat dinner together and they can discuss their day without any unwanted distractions.
In conclusion, striking the right balance between home life
and working life
is a major issue that can result in people working themselves too hard and not having opportunities to teach their children how to behave appropriately however
, it can be addressed Change preposition
by
through
strictly adhering to the agreed upon times that are just for family bonding.Change preposition
by
Submitted by asmitakhatri490 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Task Achievement
Focus on fully addressing all parts of the prompt. In your essay, while you briefly touch upon the problems and solutions, consider expanding on them with more depth and detail.
Task Achievement
Work on providing more specific, diverse examples to better illustrate your points. This will help in making your arguments more persuasive and engaging.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure a logical flow of ideas from one paragraph to another. Use more transitional phrases to create a smoother bridge between sections.
Coherence and Cohesion
Enhance your introduction and conclusion by clearly stating your point of view and summarizing your main arguments more prominently. This helps in reinforcing your stance to the reader.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!