In many parts of the world there is continuous coverage of sport on television. Some people believe that this discourages the young from taking part in any sport themselves. Discuss this view and give your own opinion.

#parts #world #coverage #sport #television #people #part

Whether live

sports

distracts youngsters from participating in

sports

in real life is a matter of debate. In my view, participating in various

sports

is much more beneficial than just watching them on

although

watching a few

games

doesn’t hurt either. In

this

essay, I will discuss and present my view.

First,

let’s begin with the fact that many

sports

channels broadcast live sporting competitions, and in many countries, there are ongoing tournaments. These days, young people are passionate about many

sports

but hardly engage in outdoor

sports

Instead

, they prefer

sports

channels as part of their entertainment rather than as an encouragement for developing their sportsmanship skill. The non-stop

sports

on television

also

discourage youngsters from becoming athletes themselves.

For instance

, more than half my college friends are huge fans of international

sports

such

as cricket and football but their experience with these

games

is minimal. They are much better critics of these

games

than they are players.

Sports

channels are not the only cause of

this

decline. The growth of video

games

and the availability of gaming consoles have

also

contributed to

this

decline.

In addition

, parents are

also

responsible for

this

degradation.

While

parents should have encouraged children to play outdoor

games

, they buy

games

, and consoles for their kids. In conclusion, the reluctance to play

games

rather than watch

sports

has been kindled by the endless sporting programs on

, parents' apathy, and widespread access to gaming devices. No doubt

sports

can be a good way to enjoy our favourite team's performance, but youngsters should not watch it all day long, and they

also

should play the

sports

themselves.

Submitted by trungnh283 on Sun Feb 18 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

You presented a balanced view effectively, but ensure all your points directly support your main argument to enhance clarity. Avoid deviating into topics such as video games and parental influence unless they directly relate to your argument on sports broadcasting's impact.

coherence & cohesion

Your essay has a good logical flow, with a clear introduction, development of ideas, and a conclusion. To further improve, ensure each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence that announces the paragraph’s main idea, making it easier for readers to follow your argument.

task achievement

Support your arguments with more specific examples and evidence. While you mention how sports channels influence youngsters, including statistics, studies, or real-life examples could make your arguments more compelling and persuasive.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

280 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

7.5

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Download Free PDF
11 Most Commonly Used English Expressions »

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

8.5
band
Writing Task 1 you have bought some clothing onllne and are not s atisfied with your purchase. Write a letter to the company that you bought the clothing from. In your email -> give details of the purchase -> describe the problem -> explain why you need a replacement urgently Write at least 150 words. You do NOT need to write any addresses. Begin your letter as follows: Dear Sir or Madam,
First of all, let me, please, express to you my real delight in your online shop. I used to buy a lot of clothes from you.
5.5
band
In some countries, the role of a mother differs in some ways from the role of a father. Why do you think these differences exist? How might parental roles develop in the future?
It’s clear that there are obvious differences existing between the role of a mother and the role of a father in some societies. Several aspects should be taken into consideration when it comes to the reasons that lead to this phenomenon. In addition, parents are supposed to play more reasonable roles in the future.
7
band
In some countries, owning a homes rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case ? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?
Nowadays, owning a home than renting one is becoming more widespread in many parts of the world. This essay will examine why homeownership is important as well as my opinions.
4.5
band
Every year several languages die out. Some people think that it is not important because life will be easier if there are fewer language in the world. To what extent do you agree or disagree with opinion?
A lot of language disappear every year. Some people believe that it is not significant since this will make their life easier when people use fewer language in the world. I completely disagree with this idea, there are fundamental factors which affect badly way to cultural structure and human lives.
5.5
band
There have been some problems with the bus service, especially its reliability, in your area over the last two weeks. Write a letter to the manager of the bus company. In your letter a. Describe what the problems are b. Explain how these problems are affecting you c. Suggest what you would like the company to do
I am your regular user because of your impeccable services, however, from the last two weeks your company's bus service has started creating problems, especially it's punctuality. I have to wait for long time at bus station as the bus's timing does not match the time on the ticket.

In many parts of the world there is continuous coverage of sport on television. Some people believe that this discourages the young from taking part in any sport themselves. Discuss this view and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In some countries, the role of a mother differs in some ways from the role of a father. Why do you think these differences exist? How might parental roles develop in the future?

In some countries, owning a homes rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case ? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Every year several languages die out. Some people think that it is not important because life will be easier if there are fewer language in the world. To what extent do you agree or disagree with opinion?