Some people think that menand women have different qualities, therefore certain jobs are suitable for men and others for women. To what extent do you agree or disagree.
A majority of people believe that
men
and women
have distinctive personalities which results in there are
jobs only suitable for one gender. Wrong verb form
being
This
writer
strongly disagrees with this
statement.
First of all, women
have a lot of features that are similar to men
so that they can do most of the jobs that are assumed for men
such
as bravery, confidence, intelligence and good leadership. For instance
, Hillary Clinton is a politician, Marie Curie is a writer
, the prime minister of Germany is a woman and there is a wide variety of female football teams in the world and they won number
of famous prizes. Change the article
a number
the number
Thus
, there are some irreplaceable barriers between men
and women
but women
can confidently compete with their male counterparts in many fields.
Another point to be considered is that the idea of picking up occupations for male or female individuals is nonsense because it was made by the customs of that community and those are usually wrong, unfair and cruel to women
. For example
, in many Muslim countries and India, women
can only stay at home and do housework because that is
the rules
of their religion. In China, most Fix the agreement mistake
rule
women
attend in entertainment industry like becoming a singer or an actress due to
the assumption of the society about them. They have to endure this
because they need money and promotion. For these reasons, following the principles of the community is a mistake.
In conclusion, it is true that there are jobs that only
for Add a missing verb
are only
men
or for women
but this
writer
believes that if both genders try hard enough, they can overshadow their typical genders in the same field. This
essay has enough pieces of evidence to prove the writer
's point of view.Submitted by [email protected] on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay has a clear and logical structure. While your essay presented points in a structured manner, enhancing the flow between paragraphs would improve its coherence.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present and serve their purposes. However, refining them for impact and clarity would strengthen your essay's overall effectiveness.
coherence cohesion
Your main points are supported, but integrating more diverse and detailed examples will enhance your argument's persuasiveness and coherence.
task achievement
Ensure your response fully addresses all parts of the task. You have provided a comprehensive response, but expanding on your examples with more in-depth analysis could further improve task achievement.
task achievement
Clarify and develop your ideas further for better comprehension and engagement. Your ideas are clear, but elaborating on them could enhance their comprehensiveness.
task achievement
Include more relevant and specific examples to support your points. While you provided examples, diversifying and deepening them will strengthen your argument and demonstrate a wider understanding of the topic.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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