Some people think that men and women have different qualities, therefore certain jobd are suitable for men and others for women. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Whether genders
in
occupations is an increasingly concerning topic of debate. Some people maintain Add a missing verb
are in
men
and women have their own performance, which then
leads to a number of particular jobs are
for Wrong verb form
being
men
and the rest are
for women. The writer of Wrong verb form
being
this
essay agrees to
the given statement Change preposition
with
due to
health strength and their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
personalities
and will shed light Fix the agreement mistake
personality
in
the latter.
There are countless reasons why people believe Change preposition
on
this
. Among them is because of each gender’s durability, in terms of men
, they are involved in hard works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
such
like
constructing and engineering Change preposition
as
that
were women’s weaker side. Correct pronoun usage
which
Although
several exceptions are
Verb problem
have
occurring
in recent days that proved they possess the ability, Wrong verb form
occurred
however
, the qualities might be different as for centuries, men
had
been maintaining the habit of completing tough Wrong verb form
have
works
.
Another culprit of Fix the agreement mistake
work
this
is women are careful in everything which
their counterparts do not own Correct word choice
and
this
skill. Because of this
, numerous jobs, for instances
doing business and planning are increasingly suitable for females in spite of a small number of males Fix the agreement mistake
instance
can
do it. Correct pronoun usage
who can
Nevertheless
, the quality gap between two
genders Correct article usage
the two
are
still enormous, in fact, females in Asian regions are frequently forced to stay at home doing chores and care for babies Correct subject-verb agreement
is
since
the very early years, Change preposition
from
therefore
they may got
used to doing Change the verb form
get
be got
this
and as mentioned, there are few of them being leaders in the world at the moment.
In conclusion, I strongly agree to
Change preposition
with
this
view due to
the mentioned opinions. However
, I encourage all males and females to take part in any jobs that they pursuit
as there are no discriminations and preventions.Replace the word
pursue
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Task Achievement
Enhance the clarity and specificity of your main points. Your arguments should distinctly support the stance you've taken, using clear and specific examples.
Coherence & Cohesion
Organize your essay more logically. Ideas should flow from one to the next more seamlessly, with better use of paragraphing to distinguish between the introduction, body, and conclusion.
Coherence & Cohesion
Use a wider range of cohesive devices (such as linking words or phrases) to better connect your ideas and paragraphs. This will improve the fluidity of your argumentation.
Task Achievement
Seek to provide a more comprehensive response to the prompt by fully addressing both sides of the argument before stating your position. This includes acknowledging potential counterarguments.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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