Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
A group of
people
present the view that economic progress
should be the most significant priority for governments, whereas
others believe that there are various sorts of progress
that are as important as the other for a nation. I strongly agree with the former opinion and my reasons will be presented in the following paragraphs.
On the one hand, some people
reasonably argue that economic progress
is of paramount importance for a community. Economic progress
has positive effects on the lives of citizens. In other words
, if people
derive a
deeper satisfaction from their salaries, more positive results will be yielded. They are more likely to work diligently as they are able to meet their basic needs. Correct article usage
apply
For example
, in Iran, people
are often struggling with many financial issues and, in turn, they are unable to concentrate on other aspects of progress
, such
as environmental concerns.
On the other hand
, another group of people
claim that environmental problems should be as substantial as economic progress
. They firmly insist that the environment is at risk of numerous threats all around the world, and governments should undertake greater responsibility for such
issues as opposed to focusing solely on economic difficulties. However
, I do not find this
argument persuasive, as the lack of economic stability can discourage individuals from tackling any other forms of progress
in a country.
In conclusion, in my view, economic stability should the
main focus for governments. A sufficient income can provide Add a missing verb
be the
people
with a chance to consider the other types of progression. Moreover
, economic stability can result in making progress
in many other fields in a nation.Submitted by maryam.nutrition1988 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Task Achievement
For Task Achievement, aim to fully address all parts of the prompt. Although you've discussed both views, integrating more specific examples and a broader range of supporting ideas can enhance clarity and engagement. Consider the wider societal, environmental, and cultural aspects as well when discussing other types of progress.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure coherence by logically organizing your essay. Your structure is generally good, but try to link ideas and paragraphs more smoothly. Use a wider range of cohesive devices beyond 'on the one hand' and 'on the other hand'. Connecting sentences within paragraphs can also help the flow of your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
For Cohesion, remember to use a variety of linking words and phrases to show the relationship between ideas. While you've done this to some extent, diversifying your transitions can make the text flow more naturally. Also, explore different ways to introduce examples and counterarguments. This enhances readability and makes your argument stronger.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.