Some people think that the best way to improve road safety is to increase the minimum legal age for driving a car or motor-bike. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Some individuals believe that in order to ensure a safer driving environment, increasing the minimum legal
age
for driving a vehicle is the best solution. I disagree with
this
statement because young
drivers
are not one of the essential
factors
that contribute to
road
safety
and there are better solutions.
To begin
with, there are other
factors
affecting
road
safety
.
Although
teenage
drivers
may cause accidents
due to
lack of practice and driving experience, drunk driving and drug driving with unconsciousness could result in serious crashes involving not only injuries but even death.
For instance
, a vast majority of
drivers
who risk themselves driving after drinking alcohol in China recently are reported to be aged between 25 to 40.
Therefore
, increasing the minimum legal
age
cannot eliminate other
factors
like self-control and morals contributing to dangerous driving. Considering the
factors
mentioned above, there are better ways to ensure
road
safety
.
Firstly
, for all
age
groups who start to learn how to drive, the driver’s
license
office should increase the duration of getting a full
license
to ensure student
drivers
gain enough practical experience under a supervisor’s monitor.
For example
, it takes at least two years for people in BC Canada to be eligible to drive alone,
whereas
in China, one can easily get a
license
within two months, yet always get criticized as appalling
drivers
by other countries.
Furthermore
, if there was a more stringent penalty for drunk and drug driving,
drivers
would consider more before taking irresponsible actions. In conclusion, I believe that increasing the
age
restriction for driving motorcycles contributes poorly to the
road
safety
problem since there are other
factors
that need to be considered. By introducing stricter rules for getting a
license
and penalties with serious consequences, the problem can be addressed more effectively.
Submitted by yuyi981121 on

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coherence cohesion
Enhance your essay's structure and logical flow by clearly linking ideas between paragraphs using a wider range of transitional phrases.
task achievement
In the task response category, ensure to address all parts of the task. While your essay does a good job of explaining why increasing the minimum legal age for driving is not the best solution, developing your arguments with more diverse examples and deeper analysis could further strengthen your position.
task achievement
To improve task achievement, discuss both sides of the argument, even if you clearly agree or disagree with the statement. This will show a thorough understanding of the topic and enhance the depth of your essay.
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