government should spent more money roads on railways than roads what do you think about this?

The graph above illustrates the output of waste in
tons
in three companies between 2000 and 2015. All in all, what stands out from the graph is that the data
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
garbage wasted by
company
C witnessed a significant incline throughout the entire period,
while
the figure for
company
A and
company
B dropped generally over the same time frame. Focusing on the number in
tons
for the
company
A and C, there was a continuous decline in the figure for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
company
A, which declined from the inception of 12 in 2000 to the
end
of almost 8 in 2015.
In contrast
, the latter
company
saw a constant rise throughout the whole survey, with the data rising from the trough of roughly 4 in 2000 until the
end
of the entire investigation, about 11
tons
in 2015. Diverting to the figure for
company
B, it rose rapidly in the initial 5 years period, reaching
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the peak of approximately 10
tons
in 2005. Subsequent to
this
, the number decreased swiftly until the
end
of the whole survey, which approached
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
end
of precisely 3
tons
in 2015.
Submitted by luoyinjian2 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction Enhancement
Consider providing a more detailed introduction that sets the context for the reader, possibly indicating the significance of waste output analysis for these companies.
Logical Structure
It’s crucial to clearly state your main points in the introduction and ensure that these points are logically and effectively developed throughout.
Conclusion Enhancement
A clearer conclusion that summarizes the main findings and possibly suggests implications or recommendations could strengthen your essay's impact.
Cohesion Improvement
Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next to enhance the flow of your essay. Transitional phrases can aid in achieving this.
Evidence Support
Include more specific examples or data to back up your arguments. This could involve comparing the rates of increase or decrease more explicitly or estimating the potential impact of these changes.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!