Nowadays, mobile phones and the internet have become increasingly important in people’s social life. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

Nowadays, mobile
phones
and the
internet
are so significant for the social lives of
individuals
.
Although
they have numerous benefits, in some situations it has harmful effects. Thanks to them one finds everything and communicates with others.
On the other
hand
, unless
community
Correct article usage
the community
show examples
control
Correct subject-verb agreement
controls
show examples
using
internet
time, they might
experience
health problems.
This
essay will explain the upsides and downsides of
this
topic. On the one
hand
,
Internet
Correct article usage
the Internet
show examples
and mobile
phones
have a lot of advantages. Owing to the
internet
and mobile
phones
humans find information more rapidly and easily than previously times.
Moreover
,
due to
the
internet
,
individuals
do not need to go to the library to learn data. Another advantage is using the
internet
contributes to quick communication.
For instance
, people who live in foreign countries and far away families thanks to
Internet
Add an article
the Internet
show examples
, person communicate with other citizens
every
Correct determiner usage
all the
show examples
time.
On the other
hand
, sometimes using the
internet
is not beneficial for humans. If
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
do not control their
internet
time, they might
experience
important health issues. Especially, eyes are so sensitive
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
the body of humans.
Thus
. public should take
precaution
Fix the agreement mistake
precautions
show examples
to protect their eyes.
Moreover
, owing to
sit
Wrong verb form
sitting
show examples
for long hours,
individuals
might
experience
obesity or have mental issues.
For example
, many researchers demonstrate people who have to use computers for long hours have the rate of mental or physical problems is higher than
ones
Correct pronoun usage
those
show examples
who have active jobs.
To sum up
, recently, mobile
phones
and
Internet
Add an article
the Internet
show examples
have had huge effects on the lives of
individuals
. People find almost all information rapidly and communicate easily thanks to the
internet
.
On the other
hand
, using the
internet
for long hours, citizens might
experience
obesity and mental issues.
Submitted by izzetmiski17 on

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Task Response
Be clear and concise in your introduction. State both the advantages and disadvantages directly to guide the reader on what to expect.
Task Response
Focus on developing comprehensive ideas in each paragraph. Provide more detailed and specific examples to support your arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion
Maintain a clear and logical structure throughout your essay. Use cohesive devices effectively to link ideas and paragraphs, ensuring smoother transitions.
Coherence and Cohesion
Introduce and conclude your essay effectively. Clearly restate your main points in the conclusion to reinforce your arguments and provide a satisfying closure.
Coherence and Cohesion
Provide real-life examples or statistics to support your points for stronger argumentation. This adds credibility and makes your essay more convincing.

Your opinion

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If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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