Some people believe that zoos are cruel so that they should be closed. However, some people hold the belief that these place are actually in terms of animal protection. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In the modern world, there are many species of animal and the zoo is the place for protecting them from threats.
However
, some arguments suggest that
zoos
are drawbacks for the creatures. In my opinion, I personally agree with the first idea.
This
essay will explain both arguments and provide my ideas.
To begin
with, keeping
animals
in
zoos
has many advantages.
Firstly
, the majority purpose of
zoos
is animal protection from their predators or from human hunts.
For example
, keeping elephants in the zoo.
Secondly
, solving extinction problems in some species. In the case of pandas in
china
Capitalize word
China
show examples
, they keep many
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
panda in the zoo for breeding.
Lastly
,
zoos
can be easy for many researchers to research. Because they have a lot of animal habitats.
In contrast
, some people argue that
zoos
are cruel to
animals
. Because of many reasons. First of all, they think it's brutal entertainment when using
animals
for acting.
For example
lask the rope on the horse's body.
Moreover
, in the show, many
zoos
have a lot of accidents with their
animals
. At
such
crocodile shows in Thailand, many performers have had their crocodiles bitten. It is a violent accident. Which is the result of keeping
animals
in jail and that increases the stress of
animals
.
To conclude
, it is undeniable that
zoos
have many impacts on many creatures in the world. Because protecting them from predators
also
regenerates a number of species by breeding them. I personally believe that
zoos
if they are
manged
Correct your spelling
managed
show examples
well and organised can serve numerous advantages for
animals
.
Submitted by kungslowjam on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear introduction that outlines the essay's structure and a conclusion that summarises the main points and states your position clearly.
coherence cohesion
Develop paragraphs with a clear main idea and supporting sentences that directly relate to this idea to enhance the logical structure of the essay.
task achievement
Include a more balanced discussion by dedicating equal development to both viewpoints before stating your own opinion to fully complete the task.
task achievement
Integrate a wider variety of specific examples to support your arguments. Try to ensure these examples are relevant and clearly illustrate your point.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • conservation
  • endangered species
  • breeding programs
  • reintroduction efforts
  • educational resources
  • psychological stress
  • naturalistic habitats
  • veterinary care
  • enrichment activities
  • stringent regulations
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!