Economic progress is one way to measure the success of one country, While some people think there are other factors. what other factors should be considers ? Within these factors, do you think anyone is more important than the others ?

#progress #measure #success #country #people #factors #anyone

It has always been difficult to determine whether the accomplishment of a province is based on economic expansion or other elements. From my standpoint, I strongly believe that economic progress plays a significant role in reflecting the development of a province, even though other factors are

also

necessary.

To begin

with, economic improvement is the key factor that contributes to the achievement of one

nation

. Take,

for example

, the US is a successful democracy with a strong economy.

This

country has a high Gross Domestic Product (GPD) and is home to many multinational corporations.

This

is to say, small or large businesses can contribute ambles to the

nation

. Just when businesses have become more sustainable and more profitable, it will bring success to one

nation

Therefore

, the economy is the foundation of long-term viability and success. Meanwhile, it is worth mentioning that the economy is not only one of the contributors,

whereas

, the standard of living is worth the value. It reflects the

overall

qualities of life in a country. Higher standards of living mean good access to healthcare services, education, safety and security, and so much more. When a country meets these standards, citizens living there will be happier and healthier.

As a result

, the quality of life is

also

crucial in determining a

nation

’s success.

According to

me, economic growth and other factors are complementary.

However

, government bodies should prioritize economic growth if they hope to see a

nation

develop. So, if the government neglects

this

sector, it could lead to no development despite growth.

Submitted by allysa.nguyen2 on Mon Feb 26 2024

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Task Achievement

To enhance Task Achievement, ensure your essay fully addresses all parts of the task. While you have made an effort to cover the topic, expanding on the variety of other factors besides economic progress would provide a more comprehensive response. Try to discuss a wider range of elements that signify a country's success, such as cultural richness, environmental sustainability, or political stability.

Coherence and Cohesion

For Coherence and Cohesion, structuring your essay with clear, distinct paragraphs for each main point can greatly improve readability. You've done well in structuring your essay but strive for clearer transitions and more explicit topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph. This would make your argumentation smoother and your ideas more accessible to the reader.

Both

Adding more specific examples and evidence to support your points could significantly enhance your score in both Task Achievement and Coherence & Cohesion. While you've provided a general example with the US, delve deeper into specifics, such as relevant statistics, historical examples, or case studies, to make your arguments more persuasive and grounded.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

257 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Economic progress is one way to measure the success of one country, While some people think there are other factors. what other factors should be considers ? Within these factors, do you think anyone is more important than the others ?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Nowadays, the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this become a positive or negative development?

In many countries, the amount of crime is increasing. What do you think are the main causes of crime? How can we deal with those causes? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

(Sofia) In many countries students’ concentration in the classroom has decreased. What are the reasons for this? What are some possible solutions? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

In modern society, many people think that primary schools should teach science and technology rather than history and geography which are useless and boring. Do you agree or disagree with the statement?