Some belief that money for education should mainly be spent on better computers while others believe it would be better spent on teachers.Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In our generation, technology is one of the means
for
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of
show examples
students
learning. Some people
stands
Verb problem
say
show examples
that
computers
Change the noun form
computer
show examples
learning is
most
Rephrase
more
show examples
important than having classes with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
teachers. Both aspects
gives
Change the verb form
give
show examples
upside and drawback to
students
, as the way of learning is different. Computer learning
such
as online courses in which
students
will be given time to study and take exams online.
This
is convenient way
especially
Add the comma(s)
, especially
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
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those
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
working
students
as they have
freedom
Add an article
the freedom
show examples
to choose the course they
Add a missing verb
are interest
show examples
interest
Replace the word
interested
show examples
with
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in
show examples
and
able
Add a missing verb
are able
show examples
to study
with
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at
show examples
their convenience.
For instance
, you can register
to
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for
show examples
courses related to music
alligning
Correct your spelling
aligning
your
interest
Fix the agreement mistake
interests
show examples
with.
On the other hand
,
attend
Wrong verb form
attending
show examples
classes with teachers
able
Add a missing verb
is able
show examples
to develop
Correct article usage
the behavioral
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behavioral
Replace the word
behaviour
show examples
of
students
.
Furthermore
, it will teach the importance of human interaction and
engaging
Correct article usage
an engaging
show examples
learning environment for
students
.
Example
Change preposition
For example
show examples
, teachers are
assiging
Correct your spelling
assigning
activities that all
students
should participate
or
Change preposition
in or
show examples
projects
Change preposition
in that
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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immediate ability of thinking is required.
To sum
up
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up,
show examples
with
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apply
show examples
, both aspects are beneficial to
students
. With
balanced
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a balanced
show examples
approach, it
ensure
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ensures
show examples
students
will benefit and learn the latest version of learning
as well as
receiving
Wrong verb form
receive
show examples
high-quality
of
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apply
show examples
teaching and mentorship.
Submitted by quilisadioanalyn19 on

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introduction clarity
Ensure to introduce both views clearly in the introduction and clearly state your own opinion. This helps frame your essay and gives the reader a clear understanding of what to expect.
paragraph development
Consider developing your paragraphs more thoroughly. Each paragraph should present a clear main idea, followed by specific examples or explanations to support your points.
linking words
To enhance cohesion, use a variety of linking words to connect ideas within and between paragraphs. This also helps with the logical flow of the essay.
grammar and punctuation
Pay attention to grammar and punctuation. Proper use of these can significantly improve the overall quality and readability of your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Investing
  • educational resources
  • collaborative learning
  • personalized and adaptive learning
  • professional development
  • talented educators
  • creative and effective teaching methods
  • human interaction
  • mentorship
  • critical thinking
  • emotional support
  • balance
  • digital tools
  • high-quality teaching
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