In some countries, a few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think that this is good for a country, while others believe that the government should control salaries and limit the amount people can earn. Discuss both sides and express your opinion.

#countries #people #salaries #country #government #control #limit #amount

In many countries, there is a huge income disparity among

people

This

is because some individuals are earning astronomical earnings. At the same time, there are many more who are struggling to make

both

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

ends meet. Some

people

therefore

, argue that the

government

should cap

salaries

. In my opinion,

this

difference in salary is good for the economy because it encourages

people

to strive harder. If there is a limit to what the public can earn, most of them will lose the incentive to work harder. The reason that encourages

people

endeavor

Change the spelling

endeavour

show examples

harder and harder is their yearning to earn higher

salaries

Therefore

, if the

government

caps the

salaries

, it will hurt the morale of employees.

Additionally

, having a small number of

people

who earn too much is not necessarily a bad thing. They act as an inspiration for the poor. These super-wealthy

people

can

also

start enterprises that create jobs and improve the living standards of the poor

people

. Income disparity is not a good thing. It makes the poor feel inadequate. But at the same time, it encourages many of them to work harder and earn more. As human beings, we have a natural tendency to want more. We get inspired by the affluent lifestyle of the rich and want to be like them.

This

human thirst to improve their living standards is the factor that drives all economies. The

government

can certainly do something to lessen the discrepancy.

For example

, it can impose higher taxes on rich

people

. It can

also

launch welfare schemes for the poor. By offering free education and health care for

people

living below the poverty line, the

government

can put them in a position to work and earn.

To conclude

, capping

salaries

is not the solution to income disparity.

Instead

, the

government

should empower the poor

people

and help them earn a good salary by offering them free education and training.

Submitted by writingbhos on Tue Feb 27 2024

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Introduction & Conclusion

Ensure your introduction clearly presents the topic and your stance. A more definitive thesis statement would effectively set the stage for your argument.

Task Achievement

Develop both sides of the argument evenly to show a balanced understanding before presenting your own opinion. This means expanding on the reasons why some people believe the government should control salaries.

Supporting Examples

Incorporate more specific examples to support your points. Real-life examples, statistics, or studies can significantly strengthen your argument.

Coherence & Cohesion

Link ideas and paragraphs more effectively using a wider range of cohesive devices. This will improve the overall flow and readability of your essay.

Conclusion

Revise your conclusion to more directly summarize your discussion and clearly restate your opinion for a stronger impact.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

320 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

wealth inequality
economic growth
motivation
talent acquisition
consumer spending
tax revenue
redistributing wealth
market forces
income disparity
social stability
freedom of choice
meritocracy

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In some countries, a few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think that this is good for a country, while others believe that the government should control salaries and limit the amount people can earn. Discuss both sides and express your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Some people believe that the latest technology is creating a divide between rich and poor. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say patriotism causes problems and is negative overall. Others feel that it is beneficial for society at large. Do the advantages of patriotism outweigh its disadvantages?