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Band 7

Some say that music, art and drama are as important as other school subjects, especially at the primary level. Do you agree or disagree?

#say #music #art #drama #school #subjects #level
Some people believe that arts-related
subjects
 are as important as other
school
subjects
, especially for primary institution children. I totally agree with
this
 statement because these
subjects
 can help children discover their talents from an early age and can increase their confidence. One reason I agree that creative
subjects
 have the same importance as other courses in primary
school
 is that they allow
students
 to find their potential capability early on.
School
 age is the most convenient time for
students
 to explore their interests by trying different activities
while
 they are young enough to pursue their hobbies. They might not have another chance later in their life
due to
 the pressures of difficult exams.
For example
, many famous singers were discovered by their music teachers at a young age and claimed they would not have been as successful without early recognition of their gift.
Moreover
, music, art, and drama
subjects
 help
students
 boost their confidence. Creative lessons teach
students
 how to perform in front of others and give them opportunities to socialize with peers.
As a result
,
students
 can realize their full potential and act more confidently.
For instance
, many psychologists recommend drama lessons to
students
 who are struggling with social anxiety because it helps to enhance confidence. In conclusion,
this
 essay completely agrees that music, art, and drama have the same value as other
subjects
 in primary
school
 because they allow children to discover their hidden talents early on and increase their self-confidence.
Submitted by maisarahamirah16 on

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task achievement
Consider providing a counterargument or addressing a potential counterpoint to strengthen your position further. This would demonstrate a more comprehensive understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Avoid repeating similar points in different words, such as mentioning confidence in both body paragraphs. Instead, introduce a new dimension or aspect of the argument.
coherence cohesion
Try to vary sentence structure and length to maintain reader interest and enhance readability. This improves the overall flow of your essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-organized with a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps to present your argument succinctly.
task achievement
Main points are supported with relevant examples, making your argument more persuasive and grounded in reality.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • holistic development
  • fostering
  • emotional intelligence
  • problem-solving skills
  • cultural awareness
  • curriculum
  • engaging
  • memorable
  • nurture
  • talents
  • core subjects
  • academic
  • professional success
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