Nowadays, an increasing number of people emigrate from one certain place to another for various reasons. In this essay, I will touch on both the benefits and drawbacks of migration.

​On the one hand, there are some positive implications of
migration
that can
result
in one’s personal growth.
Firstly
,
migration
can provide a person a unique opportunity to get to know new cultures,
languages
Correct word choice
and languages
show examples
and gain new experiences. All these are crucial to
improve
Change the verb form
improving
show examples
ourselves as an open-minded individual and a thoughtful citizen.
Furthermore
,
migration
usually secures an individual’s access to a decent future by sometimes providing better job opportunities, higher wages, and improved living standards. A case in point is people who emigrate from some Asian countries,
such
as India, China or Vietnam. Most of those people who emigrate are the ones with
lacking
Wrong verb form
lack
show examples
living standards and low-paying jobs. They tend to settle down in countries like
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
States or Canada that provide
higher paying
Add a hyphen
higher-paying
show examples
jobs with higher working standards. ​
On the other hand
, migrations have
also
several downsides.
Migration
can
result
in feelings of loneliness and isolation in some individuals, particularly if they leave behind their roots and social networks. Since humans are social creatures, if we stay out of touch with other humans for too long by not speaking their language or being limited in any way of contact with them, it might bring some psychological problems in the long term.
Moreover
, migrants might face discrimination or prejudice in their destination countries
due to
their nationality, ethnicity, or even immigrant status. To illustrate,
overall
bias against
Muslim
Correct article usage
the Muslim
show examples
community in
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
States can be shown. Every year, there are thousands of cases of discrimination which create false stereotypes about them and
result
in fear of Muslim people. ​In conclusion, it is obvious that
migration
has some upsides
such
as personal and economic growth.
Nevertheless
, it should not be ignored that it
also
might
result
in serious psychological and social problems.
Submitted by zeynalli.tarana on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Be sure to provide clearer topic sentences at the beginning of paragraphs to guide the reader on what to expect in each section.
task achievement
While specific examples are good, try to incorporate a wider variety of examples to strengthen your points and broaden the relevance of your arguments.
coherence cohesion
To improve cohesion, you can use a more varied range of transitional phrases to link your ideas and paragraphs smoothly.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: