Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
It is
controversial
topic whether Add an article
a controversial
people
might aspire to enhance their life
conditions
or accept when they encounter an unfulfilled job or a lack of money. In my opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
people
should always pave their way forward and surpass their limitations. This
essay will discuss both distinct perspectives.
On the one hand, being content with unsufficient
Correct your spelling
insufficient
life
conditions
is
might be the biggest mistake that Unnecessary verb
apply
people
do themselves. Our vocations are integral
Change the article
an integral
part
of our lives, thereby if we persistFix the agreement mistake
parts
a
job which does not resonate with us that may lead to Change preposition
in a
pysichal
and mental Correct your spelling
physical
ilnesses
. There is only one given chance to live so we should be in the pursuit of an enhanced Correct your spelling
illnesses
illness
life
. For instance
, in Turkey, a tremendous number of people
die without any fulfilled dreams. Our societal norms showcase us to accept every conditions
even though, we are not relish with them. I believe that every individual should Change to a singular noun
condition
eager
to do his best. Add a missing verb
be eager
İf
Correct your spelling
If
people
who
are well-known Correct pronoun usage
apply
satisfied
with their bad Correct word choice
and satisfied
conditions
they would not be an
important Correct article usage
apply
person
.
Fix the agreement mistake
people
On the other hand
, sometimes we are not capable of making major alterations in our lives, when we are in the face of those kinds of situations the best way is the letting
go of and Replace the word
let
accepting
whatever we encounterWrong verb form
accept
with
. Change preposition
apply
For instance
, someone who have
a health problem that Change the verb form
has
cureless
Add a missing verb
is cureless
if
would not accept the situation he could not be able to maintain his responsibilities or Correct word choice
apply
commintments
. Correct your spelling
commitments
However
, apart from those types of exclutions for a fulfilled and healthy life
we should always pursue our goal related to a better option.Submitted by aleynacanacikel on
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task achievement
Your essay addressed the topic effectively with a clear position throughout. However, for a higher score, ensure your introduction and conclusion are more distinct and purposeful. Clearly state your thesis in the introduction and succinctly summarize your main points in the conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Your ideas are generally well organized, but at times, the connection between them can be clearer. To enhance coherence, use more explicit transition phrases between paragraphs and sentences. This will make the progression of your arguments easier to follow. Also, try to structure each body paragraph around a single main idea, supported by specific examples or explanations, for better cohesion.
task achievement
To elevate your essay, integrate more specific examples that directly support your arguments. While you have mentioned examples, delve deeper into detail about how these examples reinforce your viewpoint. This specificity will bolster your arguments and make your essay more compelling.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.