In the modern world, mobile and smartphone use has become universal in most parts of the world. Although there are clearly many advantages of this technology, there are many who believe it also brings many disadvantages. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.
It is true that in modern society, technical
devices
such
as smartphones have been prevalent all around the world. Many people
believe that there are numerous advantages of this
, whereas
I am of the opinion that this
technology brings more upsides.
On the one hand, the idea of negative impacts regarding the use of mobile and other devices
is reasonable for several reasons. The first reason for this
is health issues when overusing it. This
is because when using smart devices
for too long, people
will experience bad health conditions such
as shortness of sight, headaches and lack of sleep. Secondly
, people
without self-reliance can be addicted to phones and not pay attention to work or study. As a result
, these people
will end up facing consequences that are undesirable such
as lower trust from other people
and can not achieve the goal.
Nevertheless
, I believe that the technology assistance that is
provided by these devices
is more crucial. The main one is people
can take advantage of lots of digital platforms that are installed. For example
, designers in today’s world use Adobe photoshop
to design and draw for their projects, a lot easier than using paper and can make more money Capitalize word
Photoshop
due to
the amazing outcome. Furthermore
, smart devices
come up with convenience on a daily basis to help humans access anything in the most effective way. For instance
, instead
of using telephone booths like in the past, humans can communicate with their friends through a small box or send messages immediately, saving time and money.
In conclusion, while
there are many drawbacks regarding digital facilities, namely health risks and low quality
work, I still believe that it is more beneficial to use technology Add a hyphen
low-quality
devices
because it can help people
in their career path as well as
daily life. It can be predicted that humans can improve this
to build devices
with can support us in the most significant way.Submitted by nguyetcat.dao on
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Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure all paragraphs are well-structured and logically connect to each other, with a clear topic sentence introducing the main idea of each paragraph.
Coherence & Cohesion
Incorporate more varied linking phrases to smooth transitions between sentences and ideas, enhancing the overall readability of your essay.
Task Achievement
Fully address all parts of the task. Give equal consideration to both views before stating your own opinion. Ensure that your opinion is clear throughout, not just at the end.
Task Achievement
To elevate your essay, try to include more detailed and specific examples to support your points. This adds credibility and depth to your arguments.
Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure your conclusion clearly summarizes your main points and restates your opinion. This reinforces your argument and leaves a strong final impression.
Task Achievement
Though the essay presents a balanced discussion, amplifying the examination of the disadvantages before presenting your stance would improve the balance and comprehension of your discussion.