The bar chart below shows the number of research students studying different subject in 2005.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

The given bar graph illustrates different subjects (Linguistics, psychology, natural science, engineering, programming, and mathematics) studied by

research

Use synonyms

students of different

gender

Fix the agreement mistake

genders

show examples

during the year 2005.

Overall

Linking Words

, mostly all the fields of

research

Use synonyms

were dominated by men.

However

Linking Words

, Natural sciences was the most popular

research

Use synonyms

study for both

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

genders. Mathematics was the least popular field of study among

female

Fix the agreement mistake

females

show examples

while

Linking Words

linguistics was

for

Change preposition

among

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

male

Fix the agreement mistake

males

show examples

. In terms of linguistics, more than 100 women were enrolled

while

Linking Words

the number of men was well under 100.

In contrast

Linking Words

, natural sciences was the only field of study where male and female students were equal i.e. 200.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, psychology was

also

Linking Words

another

research

Use synonyms

where 200 males and approximately 175 females were interested. Engineering and programming had

same

Change the article

a same

the same

show examples

number of males i.e. 150

while

Linking Words

the number of females

were

Change the verb form

was

show examples

around 80 and 65 respectively. Mathematics had considerably

less

Correct quantifier usage

fewer

show examples

than 50 women

whereas

Linking Words

the proportion of men

were

Change the verb form

was

show examples

sky rocketing

Correct your spelling

skyrocketing

show examples

Submitted by vasudha.gupta0818 on Tue Mar 05 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words research with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

155 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
Some people think that sport teaches children how to complete, while others believe that children learn team work. Discuss both views and give your opinion
Sport is an important part of life for many people, providing physical and emotional benefits that can last a lifetime. Some people think that sport learns for teenagers how to do results, while others believe that adults can to study with a group. In this essay, I will write on both of views of the topic. On the one hand, some people say that complete in sports make adults successfully at school. To begin with, when students winning sports game, their school will be proud and students builds the institute’s reputation. In addition, if teenagers get a lot of support from their parent and in the side of school, they obsess in order to win in the competition again. As a result, sport not only gives completing, but it also gives for student brilliant life in a future.
5
band
Adults do less exercise these days. Some people think that showing sports events on the television such as the Olympics and international tournaments is the best way to encourage adults to do exercise. Others believe there are more effective ways to do so. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Nowadays, few adults participate in physical activities. Some people believe that watching sports on TVs can motivate them to exercise. I believe that although watching sports events like the Olympics and tournaments could inspire people to go out and explore these sports, governments can educate these people about the positive effects of working out could be a better way to encourage people.
5.5
band
Some people think high school graduates should travel or work for a period of time instead of going directly to study at university. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of both approaches. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.
It is common for a student to take a gap-year in a foreign country or even work for a year prior to university. Whether a student should engage in travelling or working before embarking on a formal qualification has been a topic of debate for various years. Firstly the advantages of such activities will be discussed, followed by all the economical disadvantages one encounters on such endeavours.
4.5
band
Many schools these days have problems with poor student behaviour.Why do you think these problems occur? What could be done to tackle these problems ?
Nowadays , majority of teachers are complaining about pupils' way of behaving .All over the world , it is becoming worse and worse , and it is important to prevent before it gets substandard.This essay will look at the main solutions of the problem and propose some causes.
6
band
Wild animals have no place in the 21st century, so protecting them is a waste of resources. To what extent do you agree or disagree?e?
It is true that wild animals are impossible to see nowadays, especially in cities. Some people think that there is no particular place left for wild creatures. So, it is just a wastage of our bountiful resources, to provide them protection in this century. I completely disagree with this statement and believes that these animals should be protected and the individuals should do respect their habitats , no matter what.

The bar chart below shows the number of research students studying different subject in 2005.

Some people think that sport teaches children how to complete, while others believe that children learn team work. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Adults do less exercise these days. Some people think that showing sports events on the television such as the Olympics and international tournaments is the best way to encourage adults to do exercise. Others believe there are more effective ways to do so. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Many schools these days have problems with poor student behaviour.Why do you think these problems occur? What could be done to tackle these problems ?

Wild animals have no place in the 21st century, so protecting them is a waste of resources. To what extent do you agree or disagree?e?