Some people think that movies should only be for entertainment. Others think they should also have educational value. Discuss both views
Over recent years, (watching films) has become an increasingly debatable topic in today’s society.
While
the education feature is thought by a group of opponents not to be peripheral to movies
for kids, I would argue that movies
should exclusively be for entertainment.
To commence with, some advocates believe that educational values included in movies
play a crucial role in children’s moral development. They contest that with the assistance of lessons delivered, the audience finds plenty of chances to gain insights into realistic lives, withdrawing personal lessons about proper social behaviours according to
social standards. For instance
, teenagers would learn about the repercussions of fraud and theft through movie scenes if they had one day done the same thing.
Despite saying that, I believe that entertainment should serve as the main feature of contemporary movies
. This
is due to
the stressful life speed of people today. It is unavoidable that workers often than not work for over eight hours per day, which puts them on the verge of being burnt out. A typical example of this
matter is Japan where the rate of suicide has exponentially grown for the past five years, stemming from a rise in the amount of work shifts they have to take on. As a result
, the entertainment of films needs to function as a tool making the audience whirlwind.
In conclusion, Although
educational values are contested to become an essential factor in movies
due to
their social-awareness enhancement and knowledge of moral standards, I would reaffirm that they had better serve the audience as entertaining tools to alleviate their levels of stress.Submitted by aitam.dothi on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay structured around an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion is good. However, the development of ideas needs to be more logically sequenced to enhance the reader's understanding. Consider using more clear transition phrases between paragraphs and within paragraphs to show the relationship between ideas.
task achievement
While you have provided an overview of both views, your essay lacks depth in the analysis of these views. Elaborate your ideas with more detailed explanations and provide more specific examples to support your points. This will strengthen your argument and help you to fully address the task.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to maintaining focus within paragraphs. Each paragraph should primarily explore a single main idea. Consider revising paragraphs where the focus shifts or becomes unclear, ensuring that every sentence contributes directly to the argument or point being made.
Your opinion
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