Nowadays people use social media to keep in touch with others and be aware of news. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

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With the advent of social
media
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applications, a lot of
people
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now communicate with each other online and stay up-to-date with the latest news from all around the
world
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. The advantages of social
media
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, which provide immediate access to vital global
information
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and
connects
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connect
show examples
communities around the
world
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, outweigh its disadvantages.
First,
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social
media
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is a useful assistant for immediate global news awareness and the storage of necessary data for
further
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use. An enormously large amount of digital
information
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appearing daily in the global Wild Web is impossible to manage manually. As clear evidence of the popularity of social
media
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around the
world
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, we can provide statistics. Facebook, Instagram, Telegram, WhatsApp, and LinkedIn count their followers by billions.
Secondly
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, social
media
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enables global communication, overcoming distance. A contemporary
world
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diminishes worldwide borders. Thousands of
people
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change their permanent place of residence and relocate to other countries to pursue their academic, professional, and personal ambitions. Social
media
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usually connects these types of residents with their close contacts, despite distances around the
world
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. One obvious negative effect of social
media
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is weak interpersonal relationships.
People
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’s conversation substitutes social
media
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. In our modern
world
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, it would be 'harder to find hen's teeth' than to find
people
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free of social
media
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. Even close relatives or friends sharing the same living space prefer the remote exchange of messages to direct conversation. The situation is so severe that one sometimes may witness a couple sitting at the same table and chatting with each other via social
media
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instead
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of a natural, direct conversation. Another disadvantage of using social platforms is that the spread of misinformation can misinform and endanger communities.
According to
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Pareto's principle, 80 by 20 or around 20 per cent of
information
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may require a person to search for 80 per cent of the necessary
information
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.
This
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means that without the ability to do critical reading,
people
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can be sunk or misled by biased advice overloaded in the social
media
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landscape. The ability to search and promptly find valid material requires good reading and analytical skills, which social
media
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platforms don’t promote among their users, unfortunately.
Overall
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, the benefits for
people
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choosing social
media
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,
such
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as immediate access to vital global news and connecting communities around the
world
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despite distance, outweigh the drawbacks
such
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as traditional forms of communication and junk
information
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that the Internet is littered with.
Submitted by aakbarov2010 on

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task achievement
Your essay offers a solid structure and presents a clear argument, supporting it with relevant examples. However, introducing more detailed and specific examples could enhance your argument's persuasiveness.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, consider varying your sentence structures more and using a wider range of linking words to smoothly connect ideas.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Global connectivity
  • Maintaining relationships
  • Access to information
  • Real-time news
  • Social interaction
  • Dependence
  • Addiction
  • Privacy concerns
  • Misinformation
  • Face-to-face communication
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