IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Your next door neighbour owns a small dog that barks throughout the day and the night. Write a letter to your neighbour requesting that something be done about the dog. Include in your letter: • Your reason for writing • What you would like to happen • A nice, respectful style.

#door #neighbour #dog #night #reason #style
Dear Neighbour, I am writing to bring to your attention a concern that has been affecting my daily routine. Your small
dog
 has been barking constantly throughout the day and night, so it
distribute
Change the verb form
distributes
show examples
my peace and concentration. When I return home from school, I often find it difficult to take a nap or focus on my studies by constantly barking. At
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
present, I am preparing for
crucial
Correct article usage
a crucial
show examples
 exam ,
therefore
 I need more focus. Even at night, the barking disrupts my sleep. I feel restless and tired after less sleep. I request you to find a solution to
this
 problem. It may be helpful to keep your
dog
 away from the house at certain times or to seek professional help to stop the barking. I understand that your
dog
 is a beloved companion and precious to you, but I think it's good for everyone to find a way to reduce the noise. Because, as far as I know, other
neighbors
Change the spelling
neighbours
show examples
 have
also
 complained about your
dog
. I appreciate your understanding and I hope you will find
solution
Add an article
a solution
the solution
show examples
 to solve
this
 issue. Thank you for your attention Yours sincerely, Marjona
Submitted by omondavlat91 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure the letter has a clear beginning, body, and conclusion that seamlessly connect all ideas together. Adding more explicit transition phrases could help improve the flow between paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Check for typographical and grammatical errors, such as 'distribute' which should be 'disturbs', and ensure correct use of tenses. Pay particular attention to detail to eliminate small errors.
task achievement
While your letter effectively outlines your concern and politely requests a solution, it could be further improved by explicitly stating that you value your relationship with your neighbour and hope to resolve the issue amicably. This would better fulfill the suitable writing tone criterion.
task achievement
To improve your task achievement score, consider offering specific suggestions for what you would like your neighbour to do about the dog. For example, mention particular times when the barking is most disruptive and offer possible solutions like obedience training or a check-up with a veterinarian.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • disrupted
  • challenging
  • appreciate
  • solutions
  • training
  • anti-bark collars
  • excessive barking
  • resources
  • well-being
  • distress
  • amicably
  • cooperation
  • concern
  • neighbourly relations
  • understanding
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