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Writing Samples /
Band 4

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#countries #world #people #cities #population #countryside #development
Migration
Correct article usage
The migration
show examples
 of
people
 from rural to urban
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
 has become
comman
Correct your spelling
common
 worldwide, which results
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 low number of
people
 in the
countryside
.
This
 essay will demonstrate that
this
 is
overall
Add an article
an overall
show examples
 negative development because there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
farmers
 and
farmings
Change the noun form
farming
show examples
 lands are being converted into
industial
Correct your spelling
industrial
zone
Fix the agreement mistake
zones
show examples
.
Large
Correct article usage
A large
show examples
 number
or
Correct your spelling
of
show examples
farmers
 are
also
 moving to the metro cities.
Food
Add an article
The food
A food
show examples
 crisis is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 major issue all over the world. Farmer
migration
 is the main reason
behing
Correct your spelling
behind
this
 major crisis. All the precious monuments and historical places are located
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the
countryside
 and because of
this
migration
Add a comma
migration,
show examples
 there are very less
people
 to take care of
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
 treasures. Recent survey
seggests
Correct your spelling
suggests
suggest
 that in
asian
Change the capitalization
Asian
show examples
 countries 7.8 million
people
 have migrated to the cities from
countryside
Add an article
the countryside
show examples
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 which 5 million were
farmers
.
While
 migrating
people
 are selling their farm lands to the industry
people
 in order to get some money for the city expenses.
Countryside
Add an article
The countryside
show examples
 is comparatively less polluted than
urban
Correct article usage
the urban
show examples
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
, but
industrialization
Add an article
the industrialization
show examples
 of the rural area is reversing
this
 situation. Once used for
induatrial
Correct your spelling
industrial
purpose
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
show examples
, land
become
Change the verb form
becomes
show examples
 unfertile and can not be used for farming again.
This
cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
show examples
 irreversible damage to the environment.
For example
, A study demonstrates that 15% of farming land has been converted for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
industrial
purpose
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
show examples
. In conclusion,
this
migration
 has left very few
farmers
 in the villages and
agricultuarry
Correct your spelling
agricultural
agriculturally
 suitable land is decreasing. which has
negative
Add an article
a negative
show examples
 effect
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
Correct article usage
the ierms
show examples
ierms
Correct your spelling
terms
 of development and
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
show examples
 as well.
Submitted by pkrushi509 on

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Grammar
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Sentence Structure
Increase the complexity of your sentence structures to enhance the fluency of your essay. This can be achieved by incorporating a mix of simple, compound, and complex sentences, which will also help to better demonstrate your English language proficiency.
Coherence & Cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, make more explicit connections between your ideas and paragraphs. This can be achieved through the use of transition words and phrases, as well as by ensuring each paragraph flows logically from the one before it.
Task Response
Provide more detailed examples and evidence to support your main points. This not only strengthens your argument but also helps in achieving a higher task achievement score. Consider including statistics, studies, or personal anecdotes where appropriate.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • rural-to-urban migration
  • population shift
  • positive impact
  • negative impact
  • urbanization
  • job opportunities
  • access to education
  • access to healthcare
  • urban infrastructure
  • rural traditions
  • cultural heritage
What to do next:
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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