IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

your neighbour owns a small dog that barks throughout the day and the night. Write a letter to your neighbour requesting that something be done about the dog. Include in your letter: Your reason for writing What you would like to happen A nice, respectful style.

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Dear Sir or Madam, I hope
this
Linking Words
 finds you well. I wanted to talk about
you
Change the pronoun
your
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dog
Use synonyms
last
Linking Words
 night. The
dog
Use synonyms
 that you found
the
Correct article usage
apply
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next to the palace. That
dog
Use synonyms
 seemed smart and cute but it was wrong to draw a first conclusion. Day and night it walks through our tiny garden
however
Linking Words
 barks a lot. I would not have written it but it is not
only
Add an article
the only
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 thing that was done to my house. There is
only
Add an article
the only
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 thing that we must do is give it to
military
Add an article
the military
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. There
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
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 a
lot
Add the preposition
lot of
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ideas
Change the noun form
idea
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 to give
this
Linking Words
dog
Use synonyms
 but the
dog
Use synonyms
 that
found
Add a missing verb
was found
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 near the palace is
suspectful
Correct your spelling
suspect
. I think it looks like a
german
Capitalize word
German
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 hunter.
military
Correct article usage
The military
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 guy will appreciate it. My
sorries
Correct your spelling
worries
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 that I
send
Wrong verb form
am sending
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 you
this
Linking Words
. If you do not want to give him if he has a name, just please close your garden door or just string it. Best regards and my sorries, JoXa

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Task Achievement
In terms of Task Achievement, it's crucial to address the topic directly and provide a clear reason for writing. The letter should explicitly state the issue (the dog barking) and offer a reasonable solution, not an extreme one like giving the dog to the military, which may not be seen as feasible or relevant.
Coherence and Cohesion
For a higher score in Coherence and Cohesion, structure your letter into clear paragraphs, each focusing on a single idea. Start with a proper introduction to your concern, follow with a paragraph detailing the problem, then suggest a solution, and conclude respectfully. The logical progression of ideas is essential for clarity.
Task Achievement
Use an appropriate and consistent tone throughout the letter. A formal or semi-formal tone is expected in such scenarios. Avoid casual language or phrases that might seem disrespectful or overly informal. Phrases like 'My sorries' are too informal; instead, use 'I apologize' or 'I am sorry for any inconvenience'.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure to greet and close your letter more formally and personalised if possible. 'Dear Sir or Madam' is a good start, but closing with 'Best regards' followed by your name (as you did) is better suited. Make sure to align your closing with the overall tone of your letter.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • next-door neighbour
  • small dog
  • barks throughout the day and the night
  • reason for writing
  • disrupted
  • particularly disruptive
  • polite request
  • understanding
  • challenge
  • consider
  • specific actions
  • training the dog
  • anti-bark collar
  • seeking advice
  • vet
  • dog trainer
  • possible solutions
  • manage the situation
  • keeping the dog indoors
  • designated play area
  • pleasant closing
  • good terms
  • positive resolution
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