IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

many musseums charge for admission while others are free. do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outwegiht the disadvantages?

#musseums #charge #admission #people #museums #outwegiht
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Many
museums
Use synonyms
are charging
Wrong verb form
charge
show examples
 entrance
fee
Fix the agreement mistake
fees
show examples
from
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the visitors
while
Linking Words
 others are free. I definitely believe that charging
people
Use synonyms
 for admission
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 a lot of advantages especially to maintain certain important
operation
Fix the agreement mistake
operations
show examples
 in the
museum
Use synonyms
.
Museums
Use synonyms
 are one out of many public facilities that are vital to
Use synonyms
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
educations
Fix the agreement mistake
education
show examples
,
although
Linking Words
Correct article usage
the goverment
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goverment
Correct your spelling
government
were
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
 the only
intitution
Correct your spelling
institution
institutions
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
responsible
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
museum
Use synonyms
operations
Use synonyms
, to put all reliant
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 a public institution
in maintaining
Change preposition
to maintain
show examples
 the
operations
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
 certain public facilities might be ended in sub-standard service quality. It is because most public
intitutions
Correct your spelling
institutions
 only provide
limited
Add an article
a limited
the limited
show examples
 budget to spend in managing the operation of the
museum
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
 most of their spending
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
focus
Wrong verb form
focused
show examples
 on other important issues
such
Linking Words
 as healthcare and infrastructure.
Therefore
Linking Words
Use synonyms
museum
Fix the agreement mistake
museums
show examples
 nowadays
are
Verb problem
find it
show examples
 difficult to maintain certain
operations
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as cleanliness and
convenient
Correct article usage
a convenient
show examples
 atmosphere. Charging
fare
Fix the agreement mistake
fares
show examples
 to the
visitiors
Correct your spelling
visitors
 might
be draw
Change the verb form
draw
show examples
 many advantages for the
museum
Use synonyms
operations
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 means that
Use synonyms
museum
Correct article usage
the museum
show examples
 is not put all
its
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
reliant
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
Correct article usage
the goverment
show examples
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
body
Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
show examples
 because
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 can provide
itself
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
show examples
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the income they get from the visitors.
Linking Words
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
show examples
this
Linking Words
 policy would make
museum
Use synonyms
 management more independent and creative
especially
Add the comma(s)
, especially
show examples
 in promoting certain events or
to provide
Change the verb form
providing
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 with value added
service
Fix the agreement mistake
services
show examples
 that
beneficial
Add a missing verb
are beneficial
show examples
 for them
for example
Linking Words
provide
Wrong verb form
providing
show examples
 historical story in complement with new technology to create
more
Add an article
a more
show examples
 interactive and fun experience.
At the end
Linking Words
 of the day
people
Use synonyms
 will grow
interest
Change the verb form
interested
show examples
to visit
Change preposition
in visiting
show examples
museum
Use synonyms
 which provides
such
Linking Words
 services and
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
the museum
show examples
museum
Fix the agreement mistake
museums
show examples
would be benefited
Wrong verb form
will benefit
show examples
 in return. In my conclusion,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 definitely believe that charging visitors fees would help
museums
Use synonyms
 in maintaining or rather improve many services that
beneficial
Add a missing verb
are beneficial
show examples
 and needed by the community.
Although
Linking Words
 that policy is beneficial,
museums
Use synonyms
 have to pay attention
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 pricing strategy so that it
really
Add a missing verb
is really
show examples
 connected with the goals and not the other way around.
Submitted by rifkiw1205 on

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