Many museum charg for admission while others are free do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to musuems outweigh dsisdavantges

In
this
day and age, there are those who argue that admission tickets
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
musuems
Correct your spelling
museums
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
should be charged for visitors, though some remain
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
free. In my
opnion
Correct your spelling
opinion
, the permission of entrance fees can be beneficial and the benefits outweigh the drawbacks.
This
essay will examine the pros and cons of charging an entrance fee for museums. The most important one to consider is that the charging fees on admission to
Correct article usage
the musuem
show examples
musuem
Correct your spelling
museum
museums
could be the cost of maintenance. Even though the place represents the historical buildings, they have to hire a security guard to protect
from
Correct pronoun usage
them from
show examples
any criminal situations
as
Correct quantifier usage
such as
show examples
a thief.
Due to
the fact that the value of the show of the ancient objects could not
evaluate
Wrong verb form
be evaluated
show examples
the
Change preposition
by the
show examples
price, the custody of antique materials would be considered by hiring
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
security guards. Another essential issue is that the
musuem's
Correct your spelling
museum's
attractions should provide
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tour guides that possibly encourage many travellers, whether foreigners or local
people
to
Add a missing verb
be interest
show examples
interest
Replace the word
interested
show examples
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
myth parts effectively.
This
action represents the friendly service and expertise in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
specific subjects to numerous national
people
around the world.
On the other hand
, a
further
disadvantage
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
note is the preservation of
musuem
Correct your spelling
museum
exhibition
Fix the agreement mistake
exhibitions
show examples
should be provided by the government. They might be the financial support to maintain the history
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
being
Correct article usage
a treasure
show examples
treasure
Replace the word
treasured
show examples
country.
However
, the charged fee totally
gain
Correct subject-verb agreement
gains
show examples
income, which is less stable than supported funding from
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
becuase
Correct your spelling
because
if there
will
Verb problem
apply
show examples
are fewer
people
who come to visit, it will
resulting
Wrong verb form
result
show examples
in a loss of income unexpectedly. In conclusion, I strongly
belive
Correct your spelling
believe
show examples
that there are positive aspects outweigh
negative
Correct article usage
the negative
show examples
aspects
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
getting admission fees
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the customers. As a suggestion, paying a fee properly maintains the museums, especially various antique objects that motivate more and more
people
demand
Fix the infinitive
to demand
show examples
to visit.
Submitted by sasinipapj on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Consider varying your sentence structures to make your essay more engaging. This can include using a mix of simple, compound, and complex sentences to convey your points more clearly.
coherence cohesion
Ensure your introduction and conclusion are clear and reflect an understanding of the topic. While you have an introduction and conclusion present, making them more distinct and tying them more closely to the question can enhance effectiveness.
task achievement
Back up your main points with more specific examples and evidence. This will strengthen your arguments and make your essay more compelling to the reader.
coherence cohesion
Aim to clarify your ideas further by dividing paragraphs based on individual ideas or arguments, ensuring there is a logical flow from one section to the next. This makes your essay easier to follow and more coherent.
general
Pay attention to grammar, spelling, and punctuation, as these contribute to the clarity of your ideas and the overall professionalism of your essay.
task achievement
Ensure your essay directly responds to all parts of the prompt. Your essay should address both the advantages and disadvantages, making a clear argument as to why one outweighs the other.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: