Countries with a long average working time are more economically successful than those countries which do not have a long working time. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Some people harbour a belief that national economic success is associated with

work

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time

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Therefore

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countries

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which have long average working hours are economically superior to those without long

work

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time

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. From my perspective, I am inclined to stand with the sceptics as it is more important to develop promising industries than prolong working hours.

Initially

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, one of the main arguments for its rejection is that long

work

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time

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does not guarantee the advantages of economic performance. Take

Taiwan

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for example

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, employees in

Taiwan

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only have 17 official days off per year which is much fewer than in most Western

countries

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However

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,no one will deny that the economic development in Western

countries

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exceeds that in

Taiwan

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Thus

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Taiwan

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is a salient example which demonstrates

work

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hours are not in direct proportion to economic results.

According to

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the aforementioned, it is not the

time

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expenditure that matters in a country's economic growth. At the other end of the spectrum, a precise vision of future trends will bring about a significant impact on the social economy.

For instance

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, the growing tendency of K-pop not only considerably changes the world but

also

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makes Korean economic status skyrocket. Nowadays, Korea is known for its entertainment industry.

Hence

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, focusing on industrial enhancements is crucial to improving a country's economy.

To sum up

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, long average

work

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time

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may not be an indispensable factor

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a country’s economic growth.

Besides

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, prospering industrial development plays a relatively vital role in the improvement of economic success.

Thus

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countries

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in which employees averagely

work

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for a long

time

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do not ensure their economic increase.

s99104032Sat Mar 09 2024

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task achievement

Ensure that the introduction briefly outlines your argument and that the conclusion summarises your key points concisely. While you've done this, refining and clarifying your thesis statement would strengthen your argument.

task achievement

To improve clarity and comprehension of ideas, it is beneficial to use a variety of complex structures and vocabulary. Avoid repetition of phrases and try to diversify your language.

task achievement

To bolster your argument, provide more detailed examples and evidence. While the reference to Taiwan and Korea is effective, incorporating additional statistics or studies could further support your claims.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a good structure, showing clear organization of ideas. Enhancing logical flow can be achieved by improving transitions between paragraphs and sentences, ensuring seamless progression of thoughts.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

262 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

economic success
working hours
productivity
sustainable development
work-life balance
labor laws
efficiency
gross domestic product (GDP)
burnout
occupational health
technological innovation
industrialized nations
emerging economies
workforce
competitiveness
workplace culture
employee turnover
quality of life

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Countries with a long average working time are more economically successful than those countries which do not have a long working time. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Some countries achieve international success by building specialized facilities to train top athletes instead of providing sports facilities that everyone can use. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Particular species of plants and animals are getting extinct. What are the causes and solutions of this issue?

Some people think that newly built houses should follow the style of old houses in local areas. Others think that people should have freedom to build houses of their own style. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

For all children, the ability to play a musical instrument is just as important as the ability to read and write.’ How far do you agree with this suggestion? How important is it for a child to learn to play a musical instrument, in your view?

Many people think cheaper air travel should be encouraged because it gives ordinary people to travel further. However, others think this leads to environmental problems, so air travel should be more expansive in order to discourage people to have it. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.