The only way to improve the safety on our own road is to have stricter punishment for driving offenders. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some believe that the most effective approach to improving safety on roads is to enforce stricter punishments for
traffic
rule breakers.
This
essay strongly disagrees with that statement because,
while
punishments are important to stimulate safe driving,
this
approach may not be the sole solution to the complex issue at hand. It is important to recognize that
while
stern penalties might serve as a deterrent, they might not address the root causes of unsafe driving behaviour. Factors
such
as inadequate infrastructure, lack of education, and societal attitudes towards safe transportation
also
play significant roles in situations on the highways. Merely imposing harsh sanctions without addressing these underlying issues may only achieve temporary results and fail to bring about sustainable improvements in road accident prevention.
Moreover
, there is the risk that excessively punitive measures could lead to unintended consequences,
such
as increased resentment towards authorities, a reluctance to report accidents for fear of severe repercussions, and even corruption of the system.
For example
, in some Eastern European countries, it is common to offer a bribe to
traffic
police to avoid fines,trials, driver's license suspension, etc. for violating
traffic
rules. In
such
cases, efforts to enhance
traffic
safety might be undetermined rather than made better by the implementation of firm punishments.
To conclude
,
while
stricter fines and sentences for driving offenders can play a role in improving road safety by acting as a deterrent and promoting accountability, they should be viewed as part of a comprehensive approach that addresses the multifaceted nature of the issue.
Submitted by natallia.khrenava on

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task response
Be sure to directly address the question throughout your essay. While you have articulated your view that you strongly disagree with the statement, integrating more direct comparisons and contrasts with the opposing view could enhance your argument's depth and clarity.
coherence and cohesion
Consider expanding your range of linking words to improve flow and cohesion. You've made good use of basic connectors, but employing a wider variety could make your argumentation more sophisticated.
task response
While you provide hypothetical scenarios and mention a specific region, incorporating concrete, real-world examples would strengthen your essay. This includes statistics, studies, or notable cases, which can effectively support your points and make them more convincing.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • deterrent
  • infractions
  • harsher penalties
  • over-policing
  • driver education
  • automated traffic enforcement
  • holistic approach
  • disproportionately
  • legal representation
  • substance abuse
  • awareness campaigns
  • road infrastructure
  • legal measures
  • traffic regulations
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