Research suggests that the majority of criminals who are sent to prison commit crimes when set free. What are the reasons? What can be done to solve the problem?

In modern society, many
reseaches
Correct your spelling
researches
researchers
reveal that the severe part of criminals from
prision
Correct your spelling
prison
to society tend to commit
another crimes
Replace the adjective
another crime
other crimes
show examples
again.
Scuh
Correct your spelling
Such
phenomenon might have compelling rationales beyond
this
issue
such
as experiencing difficulty
to have
Change preposition
in having
show examples
secure jobs and lacking social connections to restart
thier
Correct your spelling
their
lives. For these reasons,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
possible solutions should be placed to address the issues. It is undeniable that the outcomes from many studies
indicates
Change the verb form
indicate
show examples
those who were
prisoned
Verb problem
imprisoned
show examples
in the past are likely to engage another illegal anti-social behaviours
such
as
robbering
Correct your spelling
robbery
robbing
, or bullying innocent citizens. As salient reasons
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
this
issue,
people
who were in
prison
may experience challenging
situation
Fix the agreement mistake
situations
show examples
to get secure jobs.
This
is
becuase
Correct your spelling
because
most individuals feel that they might be
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
risk if they are
invloved
Correct your spelling
involved
with them. To
aviod
Correct your spelling
avoid
this
sort of
issues
Fix the agreement mistake
issue
show examples
, employers usually ask their potential
empolyees
Correct your spelling
employees
to provide them
a
Add the preposition
with a
show examples
criminal record history which can be
disadvantaged
Replace the word
disadvantageous
show examples
to
people
experienced
prison
in the past.
Furthermore
, they
also
have difficulty
to settle
Change the verb form
settling
show examples
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
community
with meaningful social networks. As they might have been away from society, they perhaps do not have anyone who can
support
them to find a house, get their clothes, or have some food.
This
situation ends up putting the
people
who were released from
prison
in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
difficult
posions
Correct your spelling
positions
position
and leading them to
conducting
Change the verb form
conduct
show examples
illegal behaviours.
Nonetheless
,
although
there are significant factors
of
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apply
show examples
leading the social issues, the applicable approaches can be found
from
Change preposition
in
show examples
authorised departments. To deal with
this
issue,
Correct article usage
the governemant
show examples
governemant
Correct your spelling
government
governments
can develop a social system and
community
-based program for those to fundamentally
support
settle
Wrong verb form
settling
show examples
in the
community
well from finding a house to linking
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
secure jobs. Government can develop a supporting model and system
such
as case management
support
from non-profit
organisaions
Correct your spelling
organisations
for
priosoned
Correct your spelling
prisoned
imprisoned
people
to look after them for
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
long-term
Correct your spelling
long term
show examples
.
This
assistance should be allocated
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
people
who will be released from
prison
soon to the
community
. The
support
,
therefore
, should be able to provide
ex-presoiners
Correct your spelling
ex-prisoners
relevant
support
including housing, finding work, and accessing government
support
preventing them to
invlove
Correct your spelling
involve
other crimes or
socailly unaccpetable
Correct your spelling
socially unacceptable
behaviours. In
concultion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
,
although
hunting quality work or settling in the
community
can be
barriars
Correct your spelling
barriers
for
this
group of
people
,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
can provide a solution by developing and providing social
support
for these individuals to maintain their lives
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
community
-based.
Submitted by yeseulyou92 on

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Coherence Cohesion
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Task Achievement
To improve task achievement, ensure that your examples are more specific and directly relevant to the points you're making. This could involve stating clear examples from real world situations or hypotheticals that closely relate to the problem at hand and its potential solutions.
Coherence Cohesion
For better coherence and cohesion, ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences within that paragraph closely support that idea. Transition words can also help guide the reader through your argument more smoothly.
Task Achievement
Address the prompt directly and consistently throughout your essay. Make sure every paragraph contributes to answering the question asked by the prompt, directly discussing the reasons for the problem and the possible solutions.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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